Dark Shadows Darker Secrets

Chapter 11

I sit at my spot at the table in the library as I wait for Draken to be done talking to Benjamin. I sigh and lay my head on the table. He's going to think I'm an even bigger freak than he already does.

"I think Declan is." I hear one girl say from the table across from me.

"No way. Declan's more cute." Another says. "I like Benjamin. He's so mature and smart."

"You've never even talked to him." The other girl defends.

"So. I used like Edward the best." Both girls stop talking until one of them whispers, "Tragic." I look up at them curiously. Who's Edward?

"Well I've also thought that it's between Alec and Draken." A different girl whispers after a while. "Alec's so strong while Draken is so mysterious."

"Not me. I've always thought Draken is the best looking." I roll my eyes at the sound of Claira's voice. All the annoying girls and their fan girl crushes.

"Oh Scarlet I didn't even see you sitting there." I groan and lift my head to the unpleasant face of Claira.

"Hello Claira." I say then return to laying my head down on the hard table. "Well Scarlet, who do you think is the best looking?" Clara asks with an evil glint in her eye.

I wrinkle my nose. "I don't see any of them that way." If any of these girls see how happy these guys are with the girls they're with then they wouldn't think of them as more than friends either. Except maybe Alec and Vanessa. I can tell he likes her, but I don't know if she likes him back. And then if course there's Draken and Mallory, which seems like a one sided relationship also.

But still my answer isn't good enough for Claira. "Oh I see. You don't see them that way because you know you don't have a chance with them. Just like in these tests." Her faulty smile slowly turns into a frown. "How is it like to sleep in the same place as all the teachers?"

I glare back. Everyone in the apartment keeps everything from me just like they do to these people. Selena wouldn't even tell me what the test was today. "They treat me like any other student. I don't get any special treatments." She scoffs.

"You call skipping the first test and replacing another person not a special treatment?" I take a deep breath and attempt not to roll my eyes. It's not like it was my choice. "I promise you won't make it past these tests." She sneers.

"Are you ready to go?" Everyone turns their heads to see Draken coming towards me. I look at Clara's face to see the awe struck look clearly written on her face.

"Yes." I all but jump out of my seat to get out of here.

Draken barely gives any of the girls a glance as he walks with me out of the library. I turn to him as soon as we step outside.

"What did you and Benjamin talk about?" I ask.

"Nothing really. He just wanted to tell me your memory and how weird it is that your worst memory is also your first." I think about that. It is weird. "It's strange though, because we all expected to see your friends death as your worst memory. I was with you that night and I remember you attempts to save her even though I held you back." He looks away and stares at a building across the street, not wanting to meet my eyes.

"Did Benjamin say if those were my real parents?" I ask carefully to change the subject. He nods his head. I remember that Draken was the first one to tell me I was adopted. Too bad my real parents don't seem all that great. My mom didn't want me and my dad was the scariest thing I've ever seen.

"Did they tell you how I did?" He runs his fingers through his hair as if debating if he should say anything.

"I'm not really supposed to say." He sees my pleading eyes and sighs. "Fine. You were horrible during the memory, but as you woke up you snapped yourself out of it. Which is really good. A lot of people stay in the state they were in during the memory." I breathe a sigh of relief. Maybe I didn't do so badly after all. "Still, I find it strange that your first memory was your first."

"It didn't feel like my worst memory but.." I trail off not knowing how to explain how this memory could have possibly compared to the death of my other parents or Racheal. How could I explain the horrible feeling of neglect as my mother all but threw my away to one of the most horrific creatures I have ever seen. How could I explain how disgusted I am of myself that those things were my parents? Am I even human or what am I? Draken might not be able to understand how this memory is so horrible because I don't even understand.

"You don't have to explain." He says, interrupting my silent speech. I turn to look up at his handsome face as he walks down this grey street with me. In his vivid green eyes and worn down features I can tell he's had a lot of hurt in his life too, but I can't even begin to imagine what has ever happened to this perfect man.

"What was your memory?" My voice comes out in almost a whisper. Draken is a very guarded person who rarely never lets emotion shine through unless he's very comfortable with someone, so asking this question is asking him to let me in on a piece of his life that he may or may not want me to be a part of.

She's just a job to me

This phrase rings through my head as he stares straight ahead, debating whether to answer me or not.

Finally he looks down at my face. His beautiful green eyes meet my face.

"I had a little sister named Alice." He smiles at memory of his sister. "Right before the day I had to leave to start the tests, I decided to take her for a walk because I knew if I made it I would never see her again." His small smile slowly turns to a frown.

A dazed look crosses his face as if he isn't talking to me anymore. "I only left her for a few minutes. I looked and looked for her but she was gone." He looks down and takes a deep breath in. "I found her later that night washed up on the shore of a river a few miles from our house." He turns to me suddenly with a distant expression.

"My memory was finding her." I never put two and two together that he said he had a sister and not has.

"Draken, I'm so sorry." I whisper to him. He looks away expressionless. I've been so heartless. I blamed him for my family's death and yet a member of his family died too. And this one actually is his fault. The guilt he feels must be horrible.

"It's fine. I've tried getting over it." He pauses and presses his lips together. "I've never told anyone that." I'm not sure why, but that surprised me. Why am I the first person he's told this?

"Thanks for telling me." I say even though it sounds stupid. But I see the thanks in his eyes. Maybe it's good to get it off his shoulders.