A Real Family

Chapter 3: Yoga for Old People and Unwanted Guests

Their options were to kill him, wipe his memory, mute him, hold him captive for the rest of his life, or send someone along to keep an eye on him. Frank didn't know which would have the better outcome for him. At least he wouldn't be alone if someone was always following him around.

"Raise your hand if ya want ta kill him." Five hands/paws made their way into the air.

"Wipe his memory?" Two hands.

"Mute him?" Three witches and a sorcerer; four.

"Captive?" One.

"Follow him 'round?" Eight. He'd have a stalker then; things could be worse. Again, it would mean that he wouldn't be alone anymore, not until they determined that he really wouldn't blab on them. "Followin' him it is. We can take turns, yes?"

Most people begrudgingly muttered their agreement, but Marein and Rosaline were the first to call out that they'd take first watch. The two people in the room he halfway trusted not to hurt or kill him. Small miracles. He could feel Midas' eyes on him, however, boring holes into his back, and Frank had to stifle an uncomfortable shiver. He felt exposed, like prey, almost. Frank didn't like that and didn't want the demon anywhere near him, thank you very much.

The queen spoke first, shooting down Rosaline's offer of following Frank around. "No. If you do, I must as well, and I'm too busy for that at the moment with Winter on its way. Yule is coming as well, and we must prepare or face a revolt. Another time, Rosaline."

"Yes, your majesty."

The vampire beside Frank threw a fist into the air. "Yes! I get first watch then. Which meeaaans, I'm taking you to the silver stretchers' classes this week for yoga. I'm tired of seeing the same people every week."

"Now, hold on. I'm not doing yoga. Ever. No thanks." Frank tried to wave off the suggestion. At most, he'd go to the studio to wait on Marein to finish his classes for the day, but to participate? No. He'll stay in a lobby or something and read the paper.

Marein rolled his eyes, "Relax, Frank, I offer chair yoga as well for people who struggle to get on and off the floor."

"What are you trying to say?" he snapped. "I'm limber."

Marein looked him over and snorted, teasing him with, "Eh, sure, keep telling yourself that."

And Frank had to put up with this bull for a week or two? Heaven help him, this would drive him up a wall.

"I would like the second watch."

Frank looked at Midas and, even though he still couldn't see a smile, knew the demon was beaming from ear to ear. "Oh, hell no. I'll take just about anyone else."

He could hear the pout when Midas said, "Aw, Frank, don't be like that. We could be great friends, you know."

"With a demon? I'd rather not, thank you very much."

"Hey, he volunteered, so you're gettin' Midas for the second watch," Lenry said, trying to clean up the empty glasses on the counter. "He's harmless, mostly. Just don' agree with him an' you'll be fine."

"Yes! Don't worry Frank! I'll have an itinerary delivered to your mailbox by the end of the week so that you'll know what kind of fun we're going to have." Midas threw an arm over Frank's shoulder, "I mean unless you decide there's someone you want to get hurt, in which case, I'm here for that too."

Frank shrugged him off. "I left violence back in Vietnam and want nothing to do with it now."

Midas laughed and shook his head. "I will keep that in mind." Even demons could respect boundaries on occasion.

"We can start decidin' who will take next watch after Midas later. For now, finish ya drinks. I'm givin' last call a little early tonight." Lenry made a shooing motion. "Hurry up."

When the order was given, Frank had little choice but to turn his attention back to the perky vampire that had latched onto him. "If you're supposed to watch me, how will you when we live in separate places?"

"I'll stay with you of course! Oh, don't worry about me looking for a taste. The elderly aren't that tasty, nor are we that heartless. Elderly, children, and the sick are off-limits; it's an unspoken code around here." Frank didn't know if he believed that or not and decided that he was going to lock his bedroom door and maybe put a chair under the knob just in case.

But now he had an unexpected house guest. Great. This is what he gets for silently cursing how lonely he was. Suddenly, he had a vampire wanting to stay over for a while and a demon after that; this isn't what he meant.

"Fine. Let me pay for my drink, and we'll head home. Need to grab an overnight bag or something?" He set down some cash for his drink and a tip before heading for the door.

"If you don't mind!"

Frank sighed and motioned for Marein to follow. "Come on."

It was like having a puppy chasing his heels. Best to get it over with, he decided.