Spirk Oneshots (Star Trek)

"Spock, please help."

A/N Wow. Plot twist, I'm an actual nerd. Star Trek is happening people, hope you enjoy. Also, got any ideas for future chapters? Comment!

----Spocks POV----

Not many things annoy me. As I am half Vulcan, it would only seem logical that I don't feel or express emotions quite often. The moments where I do express what I am feeling or thinking are very rare and, embarrassingly I must say, only with my mother.

However, a call from my communicator at precisely 0500 hours did leave me feeling, as is the known saying, "Ticked off." Why must someone find it so important to call me so early in the morning?

So, with bleary eyes from sleep, I grabbed my communicator and answered the call, "Spock here."

The communicator crackled as a voice spoke loudly, "Oh thank god you're awake." Although I was quite tired and needed time to rest, I couldn't help feeling like my stomach had just caught some sort of disease where it does backflips at the sound of the captains voice.

I quickly composed myself, "Captain? What are you doing awake at this hour?" There was a crash in the background, making me flinch away from the communicator, trying to get my Vulcan ears as far away as I could from the angry yells of the captain and what sounded to be a very high pitched squeak.

I furrowed my brows, "Is that a child, captain?"

There was shuffling on the other side as Jim's voice broke through the communicator, "That! That's what I need to talk to you about."

Before I could go over the numerous reasons why it would be more beneficial for Jim to talk to me about this tomorrow morning, he hurriedly said, "Im sorry about interrupting your shore leave but Bones had to go to this medical thing and asked me to watch over Joanna for a couple hours because he doesn't trust, and I quote, 'filthy, hormone infested teenage girls trying to get a job'."

Again, before I could state that there were multiple types of living organisms, man and women, that weren't teenagers and weren't 'filthy' he continued, "So of course I agreed to watch over his kid, who wouldn't?"

"Well, I certainly-"

"But Bones has been gone for three hours and I've had to clean up more throw up then when i worked in a bar down in Iowa. Just so you know, that's a lot. I don't know what im doing and there's a lot of shit that's broken now because Joanna cant keep her hands off of glass objects." Another crash was heard as Jim let out a groan.

"Spock, please help."

The disease acted up again as I felt my face warm up. I should really speak with Dr. McCoy about this.

Clearing my throat, I stated shortly, "As you wish, captain."

A chuckle came from my communicator, sending a shiver down my back. "Spock, we're not in space, relax. I think first names are appropriate for this occasion."

"I highly disagre-"

"Thanks Spock! Ill see ya in a few."

Sighing, I placed the communicator back on my bedside table and got ready to leave. Hopefully this so called 'Joanna' wouldn't be too hard to watch over for a bit.

~Time Skip~

I was highly uninformed on how to take care of a human child.

After Jim had rushed me inside the apartment when my feet barely made contact with the doormat, I was faced with a horrid sight.

Chairs and couches were covered in glue and glitter, glass shards were clumsily moved to a corner in the living room, probably Jim's idea so the child could not get hurt, stuffing was scattered around the floor as multiple gutted out carcasses of stuffed animals lay discarded around the room.