sunrise || m.h.

Fake Happy

"I'm going for a smoke, want to come?" He asked, smiling at me expectantly.

I nodded and rose, walking onto the balcony overlooking the city. Matty joined me on the balcony, standing to my left side and lighting a cigarette, covering the flame with his hand.

The sun had started to set, changing the sky's colors. I'd noticed that sunsets we're much more brilliant than sunrises. It always looked as if someone had lit off fireworks covering the entire sky, the colors changing and fading so quickly if you looked away for a second, they'd be gone.

Turning my attention towards the ground, I watched as people walked the pavement, finishing their last activities of the day.

Matty held out the cigarette to me, the smoke dancing from the end of the stick between his fingers.

Without hesitation, I took it and sucked in a long drag. It burned my throat, but I willed myself to not cough. I wanted him to think I was cool.

Letting the smoke swirl out of my mouth and dissipate into the air in front of me, I handed the sickly sweet stick of cancer back to him.

"Jesus, Hayley." He breathed out a laugh. Shaking his head, he let it fall slightly, then raised it to look at me.

"How did I end up with a girl like you?" He questioned rhetorically.

"A girl like me?" I asked, turning to face him. "What are girls like me like?"

Running a hand through his hair, he sighed.

"Well, they're funny and charming, endearing, really. Smart, complex in the best kind of way, and have so much potential to do anything they want to if they put their mind to it. They're fake happy. I can tell by the look in her eyes that she is, but she's strong and remains positive."

He smiled at me, a playful, flirtatious smile.

"And don't forget so god damn beautiful."

"Well," I started, smiling a bit. "Girls like me don't run away from home."

Matty laughed.

"And girls like you also shouldn't be talking to guys like me."

I watched as he took a drag of his cigarette and blew the smoke back out of his mouth.

"Girls like you shouldn't have to be fake happy."

A homeless man across the street had a permanent frown, which made him look very unapproachable. Every person that walked by didn't have a smile on their face, their mouths were in straight, flat lines.

"I bet everybody here is fake happy too."

It was quiet for a while, the both of us watching the world in our peace filled silence. Matty passed his cigarette between us, my lungs craving it's bitter burn each drag I took. I loved the way it burned.

He stubbed out the last of his cigarette and flicked it to the ground, unwrapping my arm from the folded position I had been in, pulling my body towards his. Wrapping me in his arms, he rested his head on top of mine. I let my eyes fall closed and listening to the beating of his heart.

"Are you still worried about your dad?" He asked, his words muffled by my hair.

"A bit." I sighed. "I just really hope he doesn't find me. I hope nobody does."

"I'm glad I found you." He said, burying hair face in my hair.

My heart swelled.

"I'm glad you found me too."