One Hundred Sleepless Nights With Him

Day.50

Jeff's pov

Jade took the news better then I expected. She's started to come out of her room more. Still there's something off every time she talks. It's like she constantly on edge and worried about what she'll say. The words don't flow from her mouth like they used to. They hit a buffer and she rethinks them before she finally says them. In short she seems better then before but at the same time worse.

I want to ask her what's wrong but I don't want her to freak out on me. Maybe she'll open since she knows who I really am? Or well that I'm not just some weirdo. No she probably thinks I'm even more weird now that she knows. Wait what if she's only being normal about all this cause she's scared I'll kill her too. I just told her I killed my family and then ran away after hiding their bodies, why wouldn't she be scared?

"Jeff are you ok" her soft voice asks drawing me out of my head.

"Yeah I'm fine" I lie she's dealing with own stuff I shouldn't bother her.

"No you not, your ear is twitching" she says bluntly.

"Is it?" I ask amazed that the old habit hadn't died with my family.

"Yup now seriously are you ok?".

"Not really but I'm just worried about you", I tell her truthfully.

She sinks back inside herself for a second before she mutters a quiet, "sorry".

I try to tell her it's not her fault but she goes back to her room. Now I'm conflicted. Do I give her space? Or should I try to talk to her? Is she the type of girl to say to leave her alone hoping that you'll chase after her. Come Jeff think, you knew her for so many years. I never really got to find that out she had always told me if something was really bugging her. Then again so would I but didn't elaborate any further then I'm worried.

I know that we can't just snap our fingers and go back to the way we used to be but I still care about her. I always have and it hurts knowing that she's hurting. I know that's sounds self centered like I'm trying to turn her pain back on myself but I don't mean for it to be like that. I just wish we could talk about it like how we used to. I wish we could go back to when we younger laying on my bed and talking about life. But we can't cause so much has changed.

Maybe I should just leave her be, if she wanted to talk to me she would've. Right? It's fine that she doesn't want to talk to me, I only just told her the truth. I'm sure that'll take some time to adjust to even if she seems to taking it well. It's a lot to take in that the guy who kidnapped you was also your best friend. It's also a lot to take in that your missing best friend killed their whole family. I'll just give her time and she seems to get any worse then I'll talk to her. That sounds like an ok plan. I think?

I honestly don't know what to do if I'm telling the truth. Before I got Jade back in my life my only interaction with people has been with the other creepypastas. Some of those guys aren't even human or half human and all of them are some type of crazy. With them being my only source of human contact beside the people I kill for so many years I've kinda forgotten how to deal with others emotions. Slender's normally the one who plays therapist but he already doesn't like Jade.

So now not only am I most likely insane in her eyes I also don't have any social skills. Wow I think I just won the worst person to feel any type of feelings around award. I can hear the crowd cheering now. Or wait would they be boo-ing... Nah they'd be cheering cause any place with that type of award would probably think it's a good thing. To bad that's not how this works and I need to figure out how to fix this.

Maybe I could ask Slenderman without telling him it's for Jade?

Nope that won't work he can hear inside my head meaning all my thoughts are his to hear. That's how he found out I was doing good resently. It's also how he's so great at playing therapist cause we can't hide anything from him. He sometimes knows what I'm feeling before even I know. It's kinda annoying sometimes but I could really use it right now. Not for me of course but for Jade.

I wish I still had the key to her inner most thoughts but I don't. I lost the key when I disappeared without so much as a note. At the time it's what I had to do, I couldn't stay. Yet that still doesn't fully explain why I took so long to get her. I should've gotten her the second her grandma died, the second she was truly alone in this great big world. Why didn't I then? Part of me wants to say it's because I didn't want to drag her into all this. But if that was the case then why did I feel it was ok to that day? The other parts wants to say it's because I wanted her to finish her education. That's the part that makes the most sense.

I wonder what would've happened if that day never happened. If I'd never killed my family and ran away. If I stayed sane. Would me and Jade still be friends? I'm sure we would've with the way she still talked about me, but then again we could've grown apart. How would Liu be? Liu had always been a kind kid he didn't deserve to have a pycho for a brother. Maybe everything would be great if I'd never left, if I'd never met those stupid kids.

I hear her unsteady intake of breath before I hear her words, "J-Jeff?" she stutters. "Please help me." then she breaks down into tears.

I grab Jade in my arms not asking any questions. Questions can wait but she can't. She's more important and I don't need to know anything unless she wants me to. I just told her letting my shirt absorb her tears as my arms hold her weight. Her arms tighten around me as she holds me closer.

"I don't want to do it", she says letting me go.

"Do what?".  What's she talking about?

"But they won't let me... They want me to do it Jeff... I dont wanna die".

She says the last part so faintly but it's enough to make gnite every cell in my body. My whole being is prepared to protect her. I won't let whoever this get away with it. They will have to get through me before they get to her.

"Who is going to kill you Jade? Who are they?" I ask as calmly as I can.

"Me well not me... The voices they want me to kill something... Jeff I don't want the hurt anyone but I dont want to die." Her eyes widen like a deer in headlights as she starts screaming.

"I DON'T WANT TO DIE PLEASE HELP ME JEFF MAKE IT STOP" tears stream down her face and I grab her shoulders and make her look me in the eyes.

"Jade calm down baby. Calm down." I pause to let my words sink into to her. "I can help you but it won't be a permanent fix you can only do this once but it'll buy you some time before you have decide what you want to do."

Looks like I'll have to get Slenderman to help anyway. He made this medicine for me because I used to go so long without killing. It would releave the craving to kill but if you take it to many times before you actually kill something then it loses it's effects. It could also lead to death because you'll feel numb as it starts losing it effects.

"I don't want to die." Then she passes out.

Quickly I pick her up and set her down in the living room where I can keep an eye on her while I talk to slenderman. Then I turn on the TV and set it to his channel. I can't contact him the way he does me but being on his channel will send a buzzing type of feeling though him.

I can get you the medicine but it'll take a few days.

Thank you. She needs it and while you're here can you examine her.

Yes Jeff I'll examine her but if what I think is right then can I trust you to explain it all to her.

She already knows some but yes I'll answer any questions she has.

Good if that's all then I'll see you in five days with the medicine I need to make it still.

See you in five.

The TV shuts off on it's own as he disconnects from me.

Less then 120 hours I hope she can make it.

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Ahhhhhhhhhhh sorry this is so late and so bad. I've had a migraine the last few weeks and before that I had writer's block and just no motivation. Still not completely better but I'm sure you could tell by the quality of this chapter. Anyway I hope this wasn't completely horrible. Thanks for reading this garbage. Sorry

Stay you
- Izzy_bands_are_life 💙💙💙