Lady Knight Missione (Merlin fanfic)

Chapter Twenty Five

I must have passed out from the blood loss because I wake up in Guises chambers, stiff and sore. The lights blind my vision for a few minutes as I open my eyes and hear feet scurrying across and out the room. I hear the door close behind whomever it is as the light slowly clears from my eyes and I can see again. The light I soon realise is the sun just rising which means I must have been unconscious for the whole night and unaware of everything. Elie's brother. What happened to him? Did Arthur throw him in the cells? Did he prepare to execute him? He wouldn't, would he?

I sit up fast and fight to stand up as nausea and pain overtake me. I don't get far. A hand pushes my uninjured shoulder down and another supports my back as I am laid back down on the cot. I look up and my eyes meet those familiar brown ones. Elie's mum. She removes both her hands and holds my right hand in her palms. They are warm, inviting and motherly. A mother's touch that I have for so long never felt. It leaves a pang for a mother I will never have. She smiles down at me and says, "You can call me Agatha. My youngest Augustus didn't know what he was doing. He didn't mean to harm you or anyone. He was clouded with grief, we both were. Please accept my sincerest apologies."

"You are not the one who should be apologizing." I say through my teeth as I grind them together to stop myself from yelping out in pain.

She smiles sadly and picks up a small vile filled with a purple and blue liquid. She looks at it with an emotion I don't recognize and says, "I made this when my Eliot first went missing. I vowed that I would feed this to whomever is to blame for his disappearance. It would give them a slow agonizing death"- Fear washes over me as she stops for a second and then continues,-"and I thought at the time that it is what they deserve but I was wrong."

"What are you saying?"

"What I'm saying is that I have realized we all make mistakes and sometimes there are things that we have no control over. I've forgiven you. Augustus has forgiven you in his own way. And now you have to forgive yourself."

I believe her. I see forgiveness in her eyes as I have seen it before and it leaves me with a warm, good feeling. It makes me smile. She reaches over to the table nearest to me and picks up a small vile of clear almost translucent liquid. She uncaps it and holds it to my lips as she says, "No poison. Just a remedy for your pain." I trust her and drink the cold liquid. She stands, gives me another small smile and leaves. It's only after she gone to I realize what was in her eyes the whole time, grief.

The door opens again and I sit up slightly to see who it is. The movement causes what I think is the liquid I swallowed move from my stomach and throughout me. It is cold, close to freezing but soon the pain in my shoulder lessens and disappears. My vision goes fuzzy and then it clears. The first thing I see is Gwaine who must be the one that walked through the door. He looks relieved as he walks closer to me and stands beside the cot. I try to push myself up again but it proves to be too difficult and I almost fall back down. Gwaine's arms support my back as he helps me sit up and not fall over.

"You need to rest." Gwaine says. "You lost a lot of blood. Guise says that you are to stay in bed for three to five days so that you can heal."

I know he speaks the truth so I with some of his help walk to my own room and sit on my own bed. The time I get here I am breathing heavily. It takes a lot of my strength to get here, I really do need to rest but that is difficult and unappealing. I'm not sure why but ever since I got here it takes everything for me to fall asleep and most nights I don't. I would lay awake and watch as night turned into day. Eventually when I could no longer go without sleep I would drift into a slumber but it wouldn't last long and I would awake only an hour later, sometimes three if I am lucky. Whether it's the dreams or something else causing it, I don't know. Rest and sleep is something that I very much doubt I will be able to obtain.