*ON HOLD* Control | An Edward Nygma Story

Chapter 12

I leaned against the sink, staring down at the empty drain. The mirror was still fogged up from my shower, but I was too afraid to wipe it away to see my reflection. I was afraid he would be the one staring back at me. I didn't want to see that ugly sneer. I didn't want to be reminded of the monster living inside me.

"Now you're just being rude."

I gritted my teeth, forcing myself not to answer. I wasn't going to talk to him, wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of a response. I didn't ever want to hear his voice, see his face ever again. I wanted him out of me. I wanted him gone.

  "You can't get rid of me, dummy, I am you."

  I shut my eyes, threading my fingers through my damp hair. Maybe if I just focused hard enough, I could block him out, but deep down, I knew that never worked. The only thing it ever did was give me a headache.

  I let out a sigh and opened my eyes. I was losing it. I was really losing it. How could I ever hope to return to normal after something like this? I glanced up at the mirror, seeing that the fog had dissipated. I was scared I was going to see his face, but fortunately it was just my own. I looked tired. And pale, like when you've spent the night awake sick.

  I certainly felt sick. I knew the other person inside me was awful, cruel, and disturbed, but never did I dream he'd take such control over me and do something so despicable. Just thinking about last night's end was enough to make my chest tighten in panic, my stomach turn uneasily.

  "Gee, I'm flattered," he said dryly.

  "Shut up," I sighed tiredly.

  "Good comeback," he chuckled coldly.

  I tried to ignore him as I combed my hair and got dressed. I dreaded stepping out of the bathroom. A part of me felt that if maybe I just stayed locked inside the small room, what happened last night would just magically go away. Maybe time would stop and I'd just live inside my own private little world.

  Wishful thinking, of course.

  Steeling myself, I opened the door and stepped out into the rest of my apartment. I tried to focus on keeping my breathing even so I wouldn't think about anything that happened. Working myself into another panic wasn't going to help anything.

  Lauren was sleeping soundly on my bed. How she could sleep, I had no idea. Maybe it came down to pure exhaustion. She was pretty tired when we talked earlier. I still had so many questions for her, but they'd have to wait until she woke up, I supposed.

I knew if I just sat around doing nothing, I'd go crazy. I tried to busy myself in the kitchen by making some coffee for myself. I wasn't normally a coffee drinker, but today, I wanted the caffeine to help clear my mind. I'd just have some coffee, do some crosswords, and hopefully, I'd successfully distract myself for a little while. At least until Lauren was awake.

  Once I had filled my mug, I wandered over to the table with my crossword book in hand. It had been cleared since last night. I glanced over to Lauren's sleeping form. Did she clear it off?

  My thoughts began to creep to last night and I quickly shook my head to throw them off course. Sitting down, I flipped to an empty crossword page that I hadn't started yet. I looked to the clues on the side.

4 across, 6 letters

The unlawful premeditated killing of one human being by another.

I shut the book forcefully as I felt my blood run cold. I let out a shaky breath. I felt like I was in the Edgar Allen Poe poem, The Telltale Heart. Everywhere I looked, there was something to remind me of what I – no, he – did and I was caught in the middle, unable to escape.

"If they check the knife, the only fingerprints they'll find are yours," he spoke up, an unnerving edge to his voice. "Dress it up how you like, it was still you that pushed that blade into his gut."

"No, it wasn't," I forced out. I could feel another panic attack coming on and was desperately trying to stop it. "You took control of me. It wasn't me."

  "How can I take control of you if I'm just a figment of your imagination?" He pressed. "That is what you always call me.

"Right?"

  "I... That... That's not true..." I argued feebly, but I couldn't ignore the small, creeping doubts worming their way into my head.

He was right, in some aspects at least. It's true, I did call him a figment of my imagination, but that's just what I wanted to believe, right? By lying to myself, I wouldn't have to accept the horrible truth that there was someone living inside me. Not that that mattered now that he had killed someone.

But the fact remained that only my fingerprints would be on the weapon. There was no escaping that. And what kind of defence did I have? I knew he wouldn't talk, simply to spite me and blaming an unheard other person inside my head would be a surefire way to get sent to Arkham.

And I worked with the police, for goodness sake. How could I ever hope to hide this from the GCPD? Someone would file a missing persons report soon enough and knowing my luck, there would be a witness who saw him coming into my building.

There was no way out of this.

I felt my chest clench uncomfortably as my breathing grew erratic, getting caught in my throat. I gasped for air as I tried to fight the oncoming panic attack, but it was no use. It had me in its grasp and there was nothing I could do. Somewhere in that back if my mind, I heard him laugh. He was enjoying every second of my misery and I knew there would be more to come.

The dead don't just go away.

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ahhhh it's been like a million years since i updated! i'm so sorry for leaving y'all hanging!

but oof i got a chapter out! i know, i know it a bit of a filler but i think i did some fun insight into ed's head

hopefully y'all enjoyed it☺️

lemme know your thoughts in the comments! i always loving hearing from you💕💕💕