"Fingers, tongue, lips, teeth. He used all of it, moving me like a rag doll to suit his needs."
Genevieve fell in love with a boy named John.
She got her heart broken by the biggest bad boy in music.
Genevieve met a man named Connor.
She fell in lo...
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"Come to Copenhagen with me." The text sat there bold and taunting. I almost felt his breath behind my ear as if he'd said the words aloud, touching me. His callous fingers rubbing circles on the sides of my hips.
My blood raced as I thought of his words. Why would he say that? Why was he messaging me here after all of this time? It'd been eight months since he'd made 'direct' contact. It had really been 247 days since he'd drunk called me from a bar in Thailand. Longer since I'd responded to anything. Karina handled him as a client now.
But a part of me wanted to. To go with him.
The blinking cursor stared at me from the screen as it blinked in heavy intervals. My bedmate stirred next to me. It was as if he too felt the weight of my indecision, causing him to shake off the duvet leaving himself exposed. His powerful form accentuated by the moving lights of the night that crept into the room.
Exposed described us both.
John's messages stripped me bare. I felt the it all behind the walls in my chest that I kept up so high. Walls that suffocated me and kept me safe
"I can't." My thumbs said for me. I wasn't sure what the rest of me said, but I didn't have it in me to find out. The time at the top of the screen read 4:27 AM.
The blue dots danced as he replied immediately. "Why not? What's keeping you there?"
My throat was thick. My blood pumped thicker, moving in a slow and steady percussion solo.
Why not?
Life.
The past. The present. The future.
You. Me. Venice.
The stars that still shine at twilight.
I didn't reply with any of them. Call me weak, but I couldn't. "I'm going to New Jersey this weekend for the funeral."
My lungs were about to burst when I sent the message to him. Death was a convenient excuse but that didn't make any of it less painful.
He knew who I was going to help bury in New Jersey. Tyler was just as much his best friend as he was mine. I would have been more shocked by his suggestion if I didn't already know John wasn't coming.
I wasn't even mad about it. Some piece of me understood why he would keep on his tour for the two remaining shows. I knew what John he was doing.
Avoiding.
He was avoiding the void that we both felt by trying to reach out and grab my frayed edges.
I closed the app again, clearing our words. They were gone again but always alive between us. My body demanded to settle back down under the satin sheets in a readiness for a slumber that I knew would no longer come. My mind was awake with anxiety and a world of worry that I'd hoped to escape even just for a few hours.
