❝I'm trying, I really am. But, I feel so.. let down. It's like I'm falling, and there's no way to get back up.❞
Oceana Bloom, a writer and an artist, can't seem to put her pain into words and her sadness into art. It's not that everything hurts, but...
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It's been almost 11 years since that day. I still remember everything, her voice, my tears, and our connection. That music box connected us in a way I could never forget.. I keep it with me every day, and I like to listen to it when I go to bed. And, sometimes I think my heart secretly hopes that her voice would break through this empty sound that fills my room nowadays.
Ever since my mom's death, my dad has been trying to be a really good parent, always filling in for my mom's position. He's taken up two jobs and he's had to work twice as hard. It's been tough for him especially. My dad does everything he can to take care of me in the best way possible. He's come to all of my school events, my science fairs, graduations, and many more.
He's been a good dad, but it's hard to be a good mom as well.
It's hard to be both parents.
Despite the difficulties, he has given me a great education and lots of love. I'm thankful for all of that. I'm currently going to Mountain Brooke High School, as a junior and I'm basically terrified. High school is a new world, a world that I wish I was able to escape.
It's crazy and scary and magical all at once, which is pretty overwhelming for me. To keep things clear, I don't like high school. I'm a shy person, and people like me can get pushed around for being ourselves. My dad used to always try and help me to overcome my shyness, but it was never my thing.
I liked to be left alone and to keep to myself, things were easier that way. But, I'd be lying if I said I actually believed that. To be completely honest, life is not easy. Ever since my mom left, I knew things would never be the same. That day, I watched us fall apart, piece by piece. My mom held us together, but without her, I haven't stopped falling.
I feel like a broken piece, I don't fit anywhere, and no one can fix me. Because fixing takes time, and people don't have the time for a girl who doesn't have any of her own.
