Restart

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(Y/n)'s P.O.V
School's break was almost over and I haven't even started on our project... I slumped down on my desk, feeling unmotivated. "I'm emotionally, mentally and physically unstable right now." and yet I'm here, still wide awake in the middle of the night. I checked my phone. "12:59 am"

"Killua..." I whispered his name longingly.

Maybe I should take a quick stroll (?). Yeah. I'll just buy some snacks at the convenience store. I just wore a simple casual clothes, took some money and then grabbed my (f/c) coat before heading out on a snowy, cold night.

The environment seems more peaceful, well it's cuz they're asleep, obviously. The darkness doesn't scare me a bit. I liked it— Being in a state of solitude once in a while. I rubbed my hands together in order to keep them warm, taking my time in walking.

~

*Time-skips*

While I was heading back from the known 24/7 store with the necessities I bought, I saw a figure of a person lying under a tree with a dim street light at the side. It creeped me out, but then my curiosity got the better of me— my instincts strongly tells me that I needed to take a look.

Oh my god. I hurriedly went beside him and knelt down, having a terrified look. "This is horrible." I gasped. "Ryuji! Wake up!" He's burning and struggling to breathe. "W-what do I do??" I glanced around. Shouting in this time for help is not really the best option.

I was about to call for an ambulance, but he suddenly slapped my phone off. Luckily, I safely caught before it hits the ground.

Ah- Thank God, he opened his eyes.

"Ryu, listen, you have to get a grip, your place's just nearby, just a few walks and you'll be fine." I assured, placing his right arm around my shoulders, supporting him to stand as I wrapped my left arm around his waist while we walk steadily and leisurely.

~~~many walks laterr~~~

Finally, we're standing in front of his room.

I took his key card in his pocket, opening it. "Hey..." He spoke in a rasp and weak voice. "It's fine." I laid him on his bed and gave him a soft smile. "You'll be fine." He held my left hand. It's my first time seeing him so defenseless. I held back and whispered reassuringly. "I'll be back." His grip loosens, falling back asleep.

I rushed out and accidentally bumps on someone after I slammed the door open. "Sorry." I gazed up.

"Senpai—" He staggered back.

"I'm in a hurry, Killua." I cut him off, but he grabbed me by the arm. "What brings you here? visiting a friend?" He took a small peek inside and noticed a pair of shoes on the floor mat. "(Y/n), this is a guy's room. Cheating already?"

"Stop. Not a good time." I yanked my arm and closed the door behind me. "You should get some sleep right now. Retz's flight will surely be early." I added.

He didn't showed any expression. "Senpai, you're just using him as a rebound, you like me."

I slapped his left cheek in a moderate force. "Killua, stop acting like this when you're the one who wanted to break up with me, I don't get you. Liking two girls at the same time.. I guess you're still a playboy." I scoffed. "You're making things a lot harder on yourself and for us. Just make up your mind."

He was left speechless with clenched jaw upon realising his state in reality, furrowing his eyes on me. "Nevermind, let's continue this later." I dashed away to buy some medicine for my troublesome friend.

~

Killua's P.O.V
My feelings were triggered.

I touched my cheek. "Her slap wasn't that hard... So what's with this pain?"

"Harsh..." I groaned and punched the wall on the side, leaving a crack.

The certain scene that day remained in my mind and I regretted it.

I hate myself.

"Damn. I want her back." I mumbled frustratingly.

Right now, all I can think was about senpai even though I was just thinking about Retz earlier. "Damn, damn, dammit!" I cursed repeatedly.

"Killua." Someone called while I was on my way to Gon's place.

My eyes shot wide opened at the person who suddenly appeared in front of me.

"Why...." I took a step closer.

"Just want to see you for the last time." She smiled genuinely then hugged me out of nowhere.

"Killua, we're not meant to be after all."

I returned the hug, even though she rejected our last hug years ago. It looks like time has stopped just for us.

"Retz... I was wrong.... because my feelings slowly fades as time passes.... I don't feel strongly for you as before."

"I know..." She sobbed as I held her tighter. "Retz, stop making that face to the person you dumped." I whispered, leaning unto the crook of her neck.

"I k-know.." She trembles and buries her face in my chest, soaking my shirt with her tears.

I longed for this for so long— For me to reunite with her.. But I felt empty. My hatred for her has completely vanished after knowing her whole story.

Wasn't it unfair for me? All the burden I felt for her in years was easily consumed by love when she gave her sincerest apology.

I lifted my head and cupped her plump cheeks.

I do love her, but it weights less than what I have for senpai...

She held my hands as we gazed at each other for awhile.

"Killua.." She gleans closer and kissed me, nostalgia filled my body as I slowly closed my eyes, kissing back for one last time.

We pulled back. "Have a good life, Killua." She turned away while I turned around, departing as well. "Thanks, same for you." I replied and then both of us separated ways like we're some kind of strangers, pressing the restart button. It was weird— I haven't shed a single tear right now, but it was great to be freed from the shackles that I made.

You can say that... first love....doesn't usually work out.....

I feel like seeing senpai. My lips curved up into a smile. I decided to change my route, heading back.



(A/N: Merry Christmas guys! 😆 Thanks for supporting me, because of ya'll I already have a rank in fanfiction. Please continue to support me. Luv you guys lots! 💝)

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