Locked Away (GerIta)

Chapter 9

Chapter 9

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Feliciano walked along the forest edge, the moonlight breaking through the thick trees and creating just enough light for him to see. He was headed to Ludwig's section of the fence and was lucky he hasn't been spotted yet. All the experience of hiding from his missions with the resistance paid off sometimes.

He had to come late that night because Ludwig's shift only started at 11 PM. He looked down at the old watch on his wrist and realized he was early.

10:37 PM

The Italian approached the fence and was grateful that no one was on patrol yet. They shouldn't be anyway because all soldiers started walking the fence at 11. He shoved his hands into his pockets before strolling over to the left. He gasped when he felt a tug on his pant-leg.

Looking down, he saw a little girl with bright blue eyes and wonderful, walnut coloured locks looking up to him. He knelt down, smiling at the adorable child.

"Hello, bella!" He reached through the gap in the barbed wire and cupped her face in his hands. "What's your name?"

"Anna." She whispered. "I'm trying to get out."

Feliciano felt his heart sink. This poor little girl was struggling to escape, unaware that if she stayed, one day she'd be sent to the gas chambers. She looked unhealthy and too skinny, her thin fingers gripping his leg.

"I've been digging but its not working. There's a gap in the fence over here that's big enough for me to fit."

"Anna, it's dangerous for you to just leave. They could catch you and you don't have anywhere to stay." He gazed at her, trying to talk her out of it. "Bella, I-"

"No, no. I don't want to stay here anymore. I want to go somewhere peaceful and calm where the birds sing and the sun shines." She smiled. "I want to be free."

Feliciano's hands began to tremble. He wanted to help her but knew he couldn't. Even if she tried getting through the barbed wire, she would get cut. He didn't know why he was shaking but he just knew that this child did not deserve this.

Anna placed her thin hands over Feliciano's shaky ones and kissed his palm, trying to calm him down. She nuzzled her face in his hands and gazed up at him through hazy vision. At that moment, nothing around her felt so horrible and deathly. All she could see was the nice man crouching in front of her, giving her the affection she hadn't gotten since both her parents had to go left instead of right.

"Anna, please just stay here for tonight. I promise, I'll help you out but only when its safer for you." He whispered. "Tell me you'll stay, darling."

"O-okay..." She stuttered. "You can take me to my peaceful place and stay with me! We can watch the sun shine togeth-"

Bang.

The girl slumped onto the floor, dark crimson blood pooling around her skull. Feliciano immediately let out a strangled sob. He stared, wide-eyed at the limp body, heart banging in his ribcage as he clamped a shaky hand to his mouth. The Italian stood up and stumbled back a few steps. He couldn't stop the tears streaming down his face before he finally started screaming, pressing his hands to his ears to stop the ringing of the gunshot.

"FELICIANO!"

He kept screaming. All he could hear was her beautiful, soft voice and only saw her bright eyes turn dull as the bullet broke through her skull, ripping through her brain.

"FELICIANO, LISTEN TO ME!"

The Italian was grabbed by the arm and dragged into the forest, his sobs loud and heart-wrenching. He couldn't even comprehend what was going on when he slumped against the tree and hands gripped his shoulders. His vision cleared slightly and he could make out Ludwig's face through watery eyes.

"Feliciano, stop screaming." He said sternly, shaking him gently.

The Italian let out a loud whimper and didn't even bother stopping the tears that continued to flow. He trembled violently and sobbed uncontrollably.

"I need you to calm down. Feliciano if they hear you, they'll kill you too." Ludwig knew it sounded harsh but it was true. "Please, try and quiet down."

Feliciano was collected into the German's arms and he continued to shiver as he cried into his chest, gripping the sides of his jacket tightly.

Ludwig knew it was a bad idea for Feliciano to come to the fence. He knew something bad would happen and he didn't want the Italian to see how brutal the treatment was inside the camp. That wasn't even the worst.

"Feliciano." He whispered, feeling awkward as he hugged him. Ludwig hadn't hugged someone in 4 years. "I'm sorry you had to see that."

"Sh-she just wanted a peaceful place, Ludwig!" He sobbed. "She told me she wanted to go to a place where the birds sing and the sun shines. Oh god..."

Ludwig saw him staring at his hands which had some of her blood on them. He cupped his face in his hands and gazed into his unfocused eyes.

"It's okay." He nodded slowly. "She's there. She's listening to the birds singing. She's lying in the sun drenched meadow, serenity flowing through her heart. Feliciano, she's safer."

The Italian shook his head, squeezing his eyes shut. "Have you ever done that?"

Ludwig stared at him, silent.

"To a child?" His voice cracked.

The German closed his eyes and stepped back, slumping against the tree behind him. He still held Feliciano in his arms, frightened that he would leave.

"Why am I scared that you'll leave me? We barely know each other and I've already slept in your bed. What is this, Feliciano?" It almost pained him to ask, not used to this feeling.

This scared feeling of losing him. These rapid heartbeats when they touch. These strange ideals and visions of what they could be.

The Italian didn't answer. He ducked his head and grabbed his hands, squeezing them gently. He moved forward and nuzzled his face into the crook of Ludwig's, his shallow, hot breaths on his skin. He could feel the German tense up but he didn't push him away, just put his hands on his hips and rubbed small circles onto them with his thumbs.

Don't let go yet. I don't know what this is. Do I want it? Why am I allowing this? You're so close to me, your lips on my neck.

I don't like this. I can't like this. I can't get attached to him. But how can I resist? It's not fair that he can do this to me. Damn it.
But I do like it. I love this feeling. My hands on him, his lips on me. It's perfect and beautiful and he's my singing bird and my shining sun. My peace.

He's breaking my chains, like their strings; thin and fragile.

~

To be continued...