18. Learn to be Lonely

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Amjad's hand wrapped around my wrist made me squirm. Under my long sleeve was a scar of my past, wounds that healed but scars remained.

"I won't let you leave. You need to hear the truth, Zohra.."

I pulled my arm back and folded my arms.

"Your dad knew from the start." He emphasised. "My parents told your dad when he came to arrange the marriage. My dad told him about my estranged son."

Amjad's face was stern, the only time I'd seen him so serious when he told me Salma was divorcing her husband. Thankfully it didn't come to that, they separated.

"In fact, it was your dad who told my family not to tell anyone as it was my past, a mistake. Your dad still wanted to go ahead."

"No, Amjad. You can't shift the blame on my dad." I fought back. "Maybe dad knew, but he would never-NEVER-allow me to marry you if he knew you'd had a kid. He would tell me."

I was convinced of dad's loyalty. It was an unwritten rule that was bound by blood. How can my dad go against nature?

"Zohra, do you think I would be standing here if your dad didn't know?" He folded his arms and shrugged his shoulders.

I clasped my hand over my mouth totally dumbfounded. The silver frame picture, the scroll of plans, the 40% partnership. Everything aggregated to this moment. The father of all betrayals.

I paused. I wanted to cry. But not in front of Amjad. I had to hold myself together.

"So why did you go ahead? You could have said no." Words struggled to leave my mouth.

"Because I wanted to marry you." He lunged towards me. "I was terrified if you found out you'd back out. Your dad said I couldn't tell you and I guess obeyed his judgement."

I backed away and my foot hit the wall. "Why would my dad do that?" Tears pooled in my eyes. I blinked.
"Why would he ask me to marry you if he knew-" I couldn't to complete the question.

The answer was in front of me. Dad put his business partner's son before me. First it was his favourite Zeenat, and now Amjad, I was never on his list of priorities. I froze, completely and utterly numb.

"I shouldn't have listened to your dad and spoke directly to you, but my dad warned me." Amjad thought aloud.
"That's why I went ahead. I was terrified you'd find out about my past. If you knew, would you have married me?"

He waited for an answer, like I was sane enough to answer him!
"Zohra, we were good together; you gave me some great times." His tone softer and eyes softened.
"I don't know why I'm telling you this now, but when I heard about you and Zayn I kinda got angry. You deserve someone special. Someone of your calibre."

He stepped forward closing in on the distance between us. My head bowed I stood numb reeling from the revelation.
"Say you will forgive me, Zohra." He whispered. "I went ahead with what your dad said. I had no choice."

I looked into his narrow eyes. For a second I saw same Amjad that I harboured a crush of Mr Darcy's league. The moment he stepped into the office in his trendy suit and fancy car, I shrivelled into a stuttering fool. He was confident, wealthy and intelligent. His exuberant humour won me over. I pressed my lips together moistening them. He swallowed hard; I could see the Adam's apple rising and falling.

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