LUCIFER » SIMON MINTER

Chapter 58

I already felt like crying and he hadn't even said anything yet. My throat felt sore and the end of my nose stung.

Simon turned around and walked away from the shore, only to sit down in the sand a few steps away. I followed him and sat down too, keeping my distance, which was tough. All I wanted to do was reach out and hold his hand to tell him how shit I felt about the things I did, but I know he'd simply pull his hand away and not have any of it.

"How did you sleep? Did you wake up okay? Did you take the aspirin I left on your nightstand?" He asked politely.

The aspirin on my nightstand? I didn't even see it.

"I woke up with a pounding headache, but I managed it alright." I answered. Christ, this felt like the most uncomfortable interview in the world.

"Thought so," Simon said, drawing something in the sand with his toes.

"So when did you-" I was going to ask when he woke up, but I was cut off once more.

"You've changed." He stated.

"Sorry?" I asked, not quite believing what I heard.

"I mean, I thought things were good between us, but how delusional was I?" He asked rhetorically.

"If this is about last night-" I began, but he wouldn't let me finish. He was going to give me a hard time, I could feel it.

"It's like I'm always doing something wrong. Am I not good enough for you?" He asked again. His eyes were trained on the waves of the ocean. This whole time, he still hadn't looked at me once.

"No, Simon-"

"First it was the fan kiss, then it was Ed, then the whole baby crisis, and now this. Vik tells me you've been talking to him, too. Is that how you got so close with Lachlan? What's the matter with you, Lu? Why couldn't you just have told me you were unhappy?"

"I'm not un-" I tried to say but my own loud sobs cut me off this time. Tears were streaming down my face and there was no way of stopping them. I squeezed my eyes shut, refusing to believe this was really happening. The sound of the waves crashing into the shore was deafening, or maybe that was the sound of my blood rushing through my ears, I couldn't quite distinguish them. A loud cry racked through my entire body, my legs and back were shaking completely as I pulled my legs to my chest and hugged them. I stared at my toes, which were digging their way into the sand.

"I really thought we could work this out, Lu, but after last night you proved me wrong. We aren't even in the same book, let alone on the same page. And maybe that's been they way it is from the very start but I didn't notice it. Maybe we're not meant to be inside each others stories. I love you so much that it's literally breaking me, don't you see?" He continued.

Tears pricked my eyes the whole time. I was panicking for sure and he knew it, but he didn't do anything to help me this time. I thought back to when he ran out of the cinema with me and helped calm me down, and how sweet and worried he was. But now he was just sitting next to me in the sand, just us two on an entire beach, alone, letting me sort myself out. And he wouldn't even share eye contact. I looked up at the blue sky, running my fingers underneath my eyes, stopping the freshest tears from staining my cheeks even more.

"I really hoped we could be like Josh and Freya one day. They're living my dream, and I was hoping I could share it with you. I get that we're young; I completely understand that now." He said, slowly raising his voice.

"And before you start, no, I'm not going to listen to your stupid, sorry excuses. You need to figure yourself out. So how long have you been talking to Vik, huh? Or Lachlan? Is there someone else I should know about, too?" He asked. This time, he stared at me, his eyes cold. He was furious.

"No! I haven't been, I haven't been..." I wanted to say something. I wanted to defend myself. I knew I should say something. But I couldn't think of anything that would save me right now.

"Bullshit!" Simon yelled, standing up. "All you've done is make me feel shit about myself! From the very start! And this whole time, I thought I was in the wrong. It's you! It's always been you!" He glared down at me, pointing at me angrily. I pressed my forehead to my legs and began rocking myself slowly. Simon was fuming and I'd never seen him like this. I was just wishing for it to be over already.

"I'm not happy with this, with us. I think we need to take a break." He finally stated with a huff.

And that's when I dared to look up at him once more. That look in his eyes. That was enough to tell me he didn't feel the same anymore.

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Writing this made me feel v uncomfortable :/

What do you guys think will happen next? Will they make up?

Twitter: overworkdwriter