The Better Program

Chapter 4

I unlock my door and walk back over to my bed. I lean back against the headboard and hug a pillow, letting it soak in my tears. I feel so bad that Eric killed our foster dad, but I can't do anything about it.

That's the worst part.

I can't do anything. I'm so weak.

Finally Emma breaks the extremely awkward silence.

"So, about Mason. He's 16, a track athlete, and he's a foster child too. His parents died not too long ago, so please don't talk about them. He's still a little sensitive about that. He'll be sleeping in the room across from you, and I'm afraid you'll have to share the bathroom down the hall. After he's here the rest of our children will be back from a camp upstate- it's to help integrate adopted foster children who had hard childhoods. When they're back we're going to introduce you to them. Sound okay?"

"Um, yeah, sounds great," I say slowly.

I turn away from Emma and pull out my laptop. I log onto tumblr and hope she takes a hint. Fortunately, she can. I hear Emma sigh and she pats my shoulder before walking out. I scroll through your dashboard, reblogging a couple pictures and posting a few other pictures of my friends on the beach. I close my laptop my laptop and lay down. This sucks.

I have no friends here, I had to leave my foster family I had been with for a year, and I have to start a new school next week. On top of that, Emma and Brady have 6 other kids that I'll be meeting besides Mason. I don't know how I will deal with this. I grab my phone and open my Wordpress app- it's the easiest way to publish to my blog. I open a new post and begin typing.

"Hey guys! So, I'm in a new foster home again. Right now I'm the only kid here- I should be bonding with my foster mom and dad but I'm upstairs, alone. I guess I deserve that though, haha. I feel like I shouldn't be here- they already adopted 6 kids and they're taking in 2 new foster children. Oh yeah I forgot to tell you that there's a new boy coming- his name is Mason and he's my age. Since we're the only kids living on the fourth floor, we have to share a bathroom. Yeah! I have to share a bathroom with a 16 year old boy! Wait, side note- what do you think Emma's husband does for a living? Maybe tomorrow I can set up like a coffee date with them and talk to them. Okay so that's basically it. Okay actually I need help. I'm feeling massive amounts of guilt about Eric killing my foster father but I don't know what to do. It's driving me crazy- I can't eat or sleep, I'm really withdrawn and I need help. See you soon! -hazel"

I quickly post the blog and sit back. That post makes me look like an attention whore! I can't just go around saying things like that, I just want attention. I reach over to delete the post when I see something else- a comment on that very post. I unlock my phone and launch the app, checking the post.

It simply says "try the Better Program. Email jergansalyce@betterprogram.com for more details"

I open gmail and email her.