Ellie Mae

Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Deeks glared at Eric as he hurriedly shut off the feed, Nell knelt down beside Jordan and put her cardigan under her head for a pillow as Hetty came upstairs with the first aid kit. Deeks moved away as they tended to the woman, and slipped out quietly.

Climbing onto the flat roof that looked out over Greater Los Angeles, Deeks shut the door behind him, braced it with a chair Callen kept on the roof when he needed alone time and walked to the edge. He looked over and let out a chuckle, wasn't even high enough to jump from, he sank back and within moments found himself in a ball howling, crying for the loss of a child he didn't even know, he had failed her and he hadn't even met her. He was without a doubt just like his father.

How could she do this to him? To suddenly come back into his life without a word and tell him he's the father to her child…his child, his baby girl… his dead baby girl…

Deeks' breath hitched with each sob that fought its way out of his body, at least here no one could know how he felt and use it against him.

Kensi moved the chair she had seen down the hall and put it the other side of the door, glaring at any of the agents who walked past and stopped at the heart-wrenching noise that was emanating from the other side.

She knew he was breaking, and desperately wanted to be there for him, but he wouldn't welcome her seeing him like this so she did the next best thing she could, she watched his back. Jordan had been taken to Hetty's office to sit and calm down, she called the team doctor in hoping that she could help the poor woman, although even she was at a loss, this was not the outcome they had envisaged. Hetty watched as Jordan sobbed, Nell sitting close by her trying to offer whatever comfort she could as there was a loud bang from upstairs.

Kensi's voice floated down, "Deeks? Deeks….Deeks! Wait!"

Deeks came running down the stairs and headed for the door, "Mr. Deeks." Hetty asked, Deeks stopped his face distraught, but he turned and out of respect waited for her.

"Might I ask where you are going?" she asked.

"I'm going to find my little girl." He said his voice breaking, "I couldn't help her while she was alive and I'm damn well not leaving her body out there."

"Marty, I understand, I do…but you don't even know where she is." Hetty tried to reason with the detective.

"Yeah but there is a son of a bitch in San Diego that knows where she is, I'm gonna find him, get him to tell me and then I'm gonna shoot the bastard." He growled.

"What are you going to do tear the San Diego offices apart?" she asked.

"With my bare hands if I have to." He snarled.

Hetty put her hand on his arm as she made a decision, "Marty, I have to take you off the case,"

"WHAT? NO!" Deeks moved back, "Hetty you can't take me off this case, I owe her, I owe them both, I have to do this!" he begged.

Callen walked up behind her as Deeks made his plea. "Hetty, I'll take responsibility for him,"

"Mr. Callen, we don't want the case to be compromised," Hetty started.

"Compromised, he hurt one of our own, Let Deeks investigate I need my whole team Hetty, I promise he'll sit out the take down."

Hetty relented, "Very well Mr. Callen, Mr. Deeks is your responsibility; do not let him impede this investigation." She ordered. She walked off to greet the doctor who had walked in the door as Callen pulled Deeks aside.

"You gonna be able to do this?" Callen asked concerned.

Deeks shook his head, "I failed her Callen, I hadn't even met her and I failed my little girl."