Katelyn's Little Black Book of Imagines

Stay High [Lashton AU]

[A/N: This oneshot isn't supposed to go in this book, but I couldn't be bothered to worry about it because I'd forget what I was going to write.

Also, as many or most of you may know, Lashton is my favorite ship and I get so excited over it omg.

And I'm sorry this is a sad oneshot, please don't hurt me *tries to hide behind 5sos magazine*.

Now, to the oneshot :)

Warnings/Triggers: talk of cutting and hanging and suicide. Also there is a minimum talk of drugs.

Please note: As far as I know, none of these boys are gay so please do not, and I repeat do not leave ANY comments telling me that they are in fact straight.

Also please do not read if you are homophobic, I'd rather not get any comments about that.

~KatelynXX]

Ashton sighed as he took a deep breath of the smoke surrounding him.

He didn't even care about his asthma, he almost died from it before and dying didn't sound too bad right now.

He just couldn't live without him. Not after he made Ashtpn fall for him.

Ashton knew it wasn't just puppy love, he was in too deep for it to be.

He used to cut and he knew that. He knew Ashton was and still is sensitive. But he still left him for a woman. A fucking woman!

He just couldn't believe that he would cheat on him with a fucking woman. It was just too much for his brain to understand.

But right now all now he could think about was him and trying to forget.

And one thing that Ashton knew, from experience of course, was that forgetting was always the hardest part.

But maybe standing by the small coffee shop wasn't the best idea. Because that's when he saw them. Holding hands and laughing like any normal couple would.

He would never hold Ashton's hand like that. Well not in public at least.

And that's when it hit Ashton. Luke was a liar. He lied about everything. About caring, about loving Ashton and everything in between.

Ashton couldn't believe how stupid he'd been for thinking that. Especially when he showed Luke his scars and things he had done to himself.

Luke probably went and told everyone how much of a loser Ashton was.

And Ashton couldn't handle it. His thoughts were overwhelming him wholeheartedly. He just couldn't take it. And it was scaring him.

So he ran. He ran as fast as he could back to his dingy one room apartment. As soon as he got there he pulled all the ropes and blades and many bottles of pills out from under his only table.

He'd somehow managed to find a hook somewhere and he already had it drilled into the ceiling.

It took Ashton a little while but he'd decided he would overdose.

So Ashton took pill after pill, at least 20 before he started feeling like he was slipping away.

He decided to write a few letters, one to his mother, one to his brothers and one to Luke.

His name taseted sour in Ashton's mouth but he still wrote the letter. Saying he was sorry for being such a burden to Luke. Sorry for being such a good for nothing boyfriend. Sorry for everything. Even for things he shouldn't have been sorry for.

After writing the letters which felt like took hours to write when in reality it only took him a minimum of ten minutes for all three.

Ashton took at least thirty to forty more pills before collapsing on the dirty ground. The last thing he saw before he stopped breathing was Luke's beautiful face and mumbling the words 'I love you, always.'

The one thing he did not understand, was that Luke left him for a reason. He was forced to be cold towards Ashton and when they found Ashton dead in the apartment, Luke fell apart.

And when he'd read that letter, he regretted his actions towards Ashton, he couldn't believe what Ashton had done. And Luke couldn't believe his next few actions.

He had gone home, just like Ashton and hung himself. He realized he could not live without his love.

The final sentence on Luke's letter read, 'I love you Ashton, always.'