Cheating The Deck [boyxboy]

Cheating The Deck {24}

                I sat at my computer, clasping my hands together to keep them from trembling. I closed my eyes, picturing Jack limping out of his car.

                I had to do this. I was sick and tired of bearing all these burdens alone. I was tired of being trapped in the cycle of terror and abuse I'd spent so long in. It was time to break through that cage of fear and face down my demons.

                I pulled up my browser and looked over at the family picture on my dresser. If I did this, I couldn't go back. I couldn't forget any of it.

                Turning my attention back to the keyboard, I slowly typed my name into the search engine. It was time to know the truth.

                A random memory hit me, as if hoping to distract me before I could hit enter. It was one of me and my parents, before my mother left and my father tightened his hold on me. It was just the three of us washing my father's car on a nice day. My mother patiently showing me how to clean off the windshield, my father lifting me into his arms so I could reach. The two of us laughing as mom lightly sprayed us with the hose.

                A normal family. We'd been a normal family in that moment, enjoying a nice day together. A couple playing with their young son.

                But memory was a tricky thing. Had that really even happened? Was I remembering it right? Was the smile on my mother's face imagined? Was the laugh echoing through my mind really my father's?

                Feeling that light throb at the back of my head, I slammed my finger down on the enter key before I could chicken out. I dragged my gaze up to the computer screen and felt my breath catch in my throat.

                There I was, 16 and smiling, a picture my father had taken of me not long before I ran away. Under that picture, large letters screamed out the word "MISSING".

                A description of me was under the picture. 16, blonde hair, noticeable scar near my ear, my height, my weight, my eye color, the timeframe I'd disappeared in. My dad's cell number and the house number, begging for any sightings of me, any useful information. A picture of the bike I'd ridden away on.

                I kept scrolling, looking at the progression of the missing posters. Always the same picture and information, but updated to include what my current age would've been.

                There were small articles in the local newspaper begging for information on my whereabouts. There were cash rewards for any information leading to my discovery. Small articles about the failed search attempts for me.

                It seemed as though my father involved everyone he knew, but they all gave up after I turned 18. Everyone but him. There was an article not that old with the description of my 16 year old self, announcing my current age and offering money for any information that helped find me.

                I leaned back in my chair, body sagging down. He was still searching for me. He had been searching relentlessly for 5 years.

                Did my mom know I was missing? What did my dad plan to do if he ever found me?

                My door swung open and I closed my eyes. Whatever, let them know.

                "Well, look at you. You're goddamn famous," Jer said, voice close to me.

                I opened my eyes as Jer stepped up next to me. He eyed the missing poster and reached out, shutting my laptop.