Forsaken Below The Tracks

Chapter Eighteen: Saved By the Old Tool

"Grab my hand!" a loud voice boomed above my head.

I reached up as quickly as I could with my eyes shut tight thinking that at any moment my body would be as mutilated as Morgan's was when they cleaned her off of the tracks. This is it. This is how I'm meant to go. How perfectly fitting.

I felt a strong hand in mine and then I felt myself being jolted up at the same moment that the train began screeching to a halt at the exact same place where I was just laying contorted and disoriented on the tracks. I looked around. Panic-stricken. Ghostly white. And feeling like I was going to puke all over whoever it was who just saved me. I recognized the face instantly. It was one that I hadn't seen in three years. I really did almost vomit.

Liam.

"Jenn, Jesus, are you okay? What in the hell were you thinking getting so close to the tracks like that? You could have gotten yourself..." his voice trailed off. He didn't need to finish that sentence.

"I... I don't know what happened. I dropped, my hair thing, went to pick it up and it just felt like someone shoved me onto the tracks. I don't know how I could have lost my balance like that. Thank you for helping, really," I stammered and looked away.

Liam and I hadn't spoken since it happened. He and I were both brought in for questioning about Morgan's death. He had strongly asserted that I had pushed her. There was no evidence that could lay claim as to the fact that I did or didn't. There was no surveillance footage because the cameras in the area were ironically down for maintenance and there were no witnesses besides Liam and myself. And I couldn't remember anything. I went to the hospital after the questioning by the detectives and sure enough, they had found enough Rohypnol in my system to knock out a horse. How I ingested it though was anyone's guess. No charges were ever filed and her case remained cold.

At the time I couldn't believe that Liam would have ever tried to push her death on me. As the years passed I began to forgive him. To give him the benefit of the doubt that maybe she simply slipped and he couldn't save her so he had to put the blame on someone, and I just so happened to be there. But, I still don't remember being there. This contact between him and I was more than unexpected. And meeting here, at this place, was just too much for me to handle.

"It's no problem. I'm glad I was here," he said gently, but I noted that he couldn't make eye contact with me either.

"How have you been?" I replied back awkwardly. He had just saved my life from meeting the same fate as our beloved Morgan. I had to force myself to say words and choke back the tears that were threatening to come.

"I've, uh, been okay, I guess. How about you?" He asked. 

"About the same, I guess. I moved back home after the accident. Things really just haven't been the same."

"I heard you moved back. Are you back at school?"

"Yes. Classes started a couple of weeks ago. You?"

"Same here. I'm over at Brookdale now. The University was just too much. Classes, work, it was just too much and I needed to slow things down with my degree. I'll finish. But, you know, it's just been hard."

I nodded in agreement. It has been hard, I wanted to say. I kept my mouth shut, so he continued this increasingly awkward conversation, though as to why, I couldn't say.

"Are you and Erik still an item?"

I nodded again, "Yeah. Things have actually been pretty decent between us. We got tighter, after the accident, if that makes sense. He's been talking about settling down, asked me to move in, but like you said, it's been..."

"Tough," he finished.

"Exactly."

We both looked away from each other. My train started to pull up, so I grabbed my bag and stood up.

"This is me," I tilted my head toward the train, "Liam, thank you again, I uh, can't thank you enough.

"Yeah, I thought it might be. Mine should be rolling in soon. Take care of yourself, okay, Jenn? I'm uh... sorry... for things."

"Water under the bridge," I shrugged, "take care too."

As I turned to hop on the train he called out my name and I turned.

"You saw her didn't you?"

"What?"

"Morgan. You saw her, didn't you?"

The train started to roll away from the platform before I got a chance to reply to his question. I didn't know what I would have said if I had the chance to provide a response. Instead, I found a seat away from everyone and pulled out Morgan's hairclip, crying silently as the buildings, houses and fields passed me by.