Moving On (boyxboy)

What He Told Me

Thayer POV*

The lunch table was silent. You know, that creepy silence that happens when half of the clique is upset and no one knows what to say or do? Yeah, that silence. Micah told me he didn't go to the college he was SUPPOSED to go to for the week he was gone. Which, I guess is fine, but it is the fact that he didn't tell me beforehand. Oh yeah, and the fact that he went to a college that didn't offer my degree choice. 

I wasn't really hungry. Everyone was just eating in silence and it wasn't their fault and don't deserve to have an awkward day because me and Micah are fighting. At the same time I felt this way for everyone, I didn't know what to say. I figured I could alleviate it by getting up and walking away. Maybe I could go to the library in the quiet and think about everything. I got up and started to pack my uneaten lunch into my backpack.

"Where are you heading?" Nick asked, breaking the silence. I looked at him, then everyone else, except Thayer. 

"Library" I walked out. 

When I got to the library, there was a study group sitting at the front table. I had to awkwardly walk around them to find a rejected open seat at the far end. For the first time in the last couple days, I didn't mind being alone. 

Micah POV*

I messed up. I really messed up. Thayer won't even look at me. He left during lunch and hasn't said a word when he was there. As soon as he left I was drilled with questions.

"What did you do?" 

"I never have seen you guys like this."

"He waited all week and now he won't talk to you...what happened?"

I couldn't answer them. I felt horrible. I also felt like I couldn't share what I did because I already disrespected Micah enough by not going to the specific college I said I was. When lunch was over I told everyone we were fine or will be fine, and not to worry. I went to the library and looked for Thayer. I found him, over at the far end of the front table hiding behind a group of kids. He saw me and turned his chair a little farther away. When I walked up to him he rubbed his eyes.

"Can we talk after school?" I asked. He finally looked at me but I almost wish he hadn't because it was the saddest look I'd seen yet. 

"Only if you take me to Blue Slushy." He pleaded. Blue Slushy was literally a 20-minute drive out of my way but it was also Micah's favorite frozen yogurt place. 

"Okay, deal. Can I walk you to class?" I asked.

"Uhm no, I want to go now." He got up and pushed his chair in. He motioned for me to move and head for the door. I guess he was talking to me now so I wasn't going to argue. I moved to let him through first and then followed after him. He walked the entire way, out to my car, without talking to me or anyone for that matter. When we got to my car he grabbed my extra hoodie from the back. Right before he finished pulling it over his head through the head hole I caught a glimpse of him smelling it. Probably weird to most but also comforting. I just stood there watching him. When he was done and just about to get into my car he looked over and noticed I was watching.  

"What?" He got in the passenger seat. I got in and started my car. Driving off I watched in my rearview mirror as I left the parking lot. I finally realized I didn't want high school to end because I was afraid of being an adult. 

"Thayer, I -" 

"I just really don't want to be a highschooler anymore. I don't want to go back for the rest of the day so when we are done with frozen yogurt and you want to go back you can. Just drop me off at my house." He said pulling his feat into a crossed leg position the way he always does in the passenger seat. I have heard from Nick and the rest that he had a rough week at school. I don't understand why he hates it all of the sudden. 

"I'll stay with you if that is okay. Why are you so upset about school?" I asked.

"I just want to graduate. I just want to find a college and be with you in that college. I wanted to have you come back after a week and tell me you found the college that we were going to and that everything was going to work out and-" I stopped him.

"Thayer, I didn't go because I guess...I guess I was just being selfish and wanted to see an all art college. I didn't know you were so anxious about getting a decision made." Which was true. I don't know why he was so desperate to get out of high school and start a new chapter. 

"Why don't you want to find a college? It is like you don't even want to try to get plans made. Like you don't even want to graduate high school..." He said turning towards the window. Maybe he was right. I thought that same thought earlier but I didn't think he was thinking it too. 

"I am afraid to like...to do something...to graduate. I am afraid to leave and go to college. I don't understand why you're so cool with these things that are changing. I don't want to leave what I know. I don't want to leave my friends...our friends." I sighed. I finally said it. 

"I wish you would have told me that earlier." He looked at me and pointed to the frozen yogurt shop. I parked in front. "All of our friends have found places and are preparing their stuff to get ready and go. They have sent in applications and everything. Everyone is ready. Then there is us. I am being questioned why I haven't applied by myself or did anything by myself. I can't tell them why." He opens his door and gets out but waits for me to meet him by his door. "Do you know why I can't tell them?" He asks.

"No, I actually have no idea where you're going with this," I responded. 

"I can't tell them that I honestly don't see any life without you in it. They, would get all worried and tell me I need to find myself or some other stupid excuse as to why they are afraid to love someone themselves as much as I love you." He said looking for my response.

"I love you too. I just..I just don't know what I am supposed to be doing anymore I guess." I said taking his hand. "Are we good though?" I asked.

"Yeah, as long as we can talk later about it. And as long as you buy my frozen yogurt!" He said pulling my hand around and dragging me into the parlor. I had somethings to work out yes, but first frozen yogurt.