It was weird to see just how affected Dan was by the disappearance of his boy.
He stopped Fading, which may have, at one point, been a good thing; may have signaled the start of a better era, for his mental health and physical well being (he may not fully realize it, but being in a Fade for too long could be deadly. He'd lose his thought process, his sanity, his memory, and eventually his ability to function whatsoever, until it would be impossible for him the break the Fade. Dan Howell, though appearing alive, would be as good as dead). Instead, it was depressing; he wouldn't go to school, would barely eat. Every night, despite his mother's protests and the sleeping pills his doctor had put him on, he would lay awake, fighting the itch behind his eyes.
He didn't want to Fade, because that would mean missing something—whether it be an insignificant part of his day or an entire conversation with the boy. Even his dreams couldn't clue him in on everything.
At the same time, though, he didn't want to live, because it meant sleep. And sleep meant watching his brother die again.
He didn't know which was worse. All he knew was that, if he continued like this, he wouldn't survive.
And maybe that was the best choice of them all.
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Don't Forget (Phan)
FanfictionDan has a "gift", but one less like the kind you'd find in comic books, and more like the one you'd find a depressed teenager wishing he had. Which, coincidentally, is exactly how he gained his not-so-super power: angst, a few tears, and a misled 11...
