Something Real | MakoHaru

love is white as snow

   Haru always hated this. He hated how Makoto is too stubborn at anything. He is so sure that if it ends up this way, it would be finished.

   'But Makoto, you have to forget me.'

   The smile on Makoto's face quickly faded like a whiff of perfume. He furrowed his eyebrows, confused. 'But why, Haru?'

   'Because in everything you do to me, Makoto, you end up hurting yourself.'

   He did not mean it that way.

   He did not mean that Makoto is a pain in the ass.

   He did not mean that everything he did is worthless and insignificant.

   He did not mean that he didn't felt touched of everything he sacrificed for him.

   All he meant was that Makoto is blaming himself for all that happened in his life that he didn't even do.

   Ever since they met, he always looked at him as his bestfriend.

   However, it's a lie.

   When they were just kids who knew innocently nothing about how the world works, he could feel the smallest thumping of his heart every time that tiny boy would give his pearly white grin on him. He ignored those, thinking those were just emotions felt when you are with a dear friend.

   As time passed, those became overwhelming and louder. But it slowly faded. He always thought that it faded by the time he was able to understand how love works between two people, but somehow it left a fake impression as they grew older.

   Haru mistaken it as love by the time Rin showed up again after coming back to Australia.

   He always wondered why these feelings in seeing Rin are so familiar, but in reality he just saw Rin as an illusion of Makoto's little self.

   Somehow, he was unaware that he was just looking at the shadow behind Rin.

   And it was Makoto.

   Rin, too, realised this by the time he saw them by chance on Nagisa and Rei's party. He thought that Haru is into him, but instead it was because he and Makoto were similiar in some ways.

   He noticed that even if Makoto was sweet as honey and pure as the water, he has a dangerous side lurking beneath him.

   And at last, it unleashed.

   Looking at the white sky, Haru stood there, frozen. He didn't care how cold it was, or how the snow fell and blocked his sight, but he just stood there. It's white, and everything is peaceful. He always loved the winter, like the way he loved Makoto. Cold and freezing in the outside, but warm in the inside.

   'Nii-chan, what does it take to love someone?' He turned his head and saw a kid and her older brothe building a snowman.

   'Ayu, loving someone is like caring.' He could not take his eyes off as soon as the two started conversing. It felt like he has done this kind of thing with someone, and suddenly, his heart started giving those little thumps as soon as he remembered it was Makoto. 'When you love someone, you take care of them so that they won't be hurt.'

   'Does it mean that if you hurt someone, you don't love them?'

   'No, Ayu. There'll still be times where you'll hurt them even if you love them. Example, when you lie or even doubt them, you hurt them because they gave their all to you, yet you didn't give it back.'

   'So, it means that when you love someone, you should love them, nii-chan?'

   'There are things like that. When you love someone, and they love you back, that's great. But sometimes, the person you give love doesn't give it back. And that hurts.'