Everything's going to be okay

Chapter 1

The rescue mission was a success. Almost everyone was out. Novices (apart from me) were sent to take the Moroi back behind the wards. We were all waiting on my mother and Dimitri's group who were right behind us.

It seemed like everyone was out. We started walking back. I suddenly started to panic because I hadn't seen Dimitri. "where's Dimitri" I shouted in a worried voice. I realised everyone had sombre looks on their face. Nobody answered my question. On the verge of a meltdown I repeated my question.

This time my mother answered. "Rose you have to understand. We had to get out he told us to go. He said he had it. It was one strigoi. I had to get everyone safe. When I turned around I saw him on the floor in a pool of blood. The strigoi had gone. I know you were close to your mentor Rose but we can get you a new one. He's gone. Rosemarie, Guardian Belikov is dead"

The world around me seemed to blur. I was on the floor with tears streaming down my face. Next thing I knew I heard a blood-curdling scream echoing through the forest. I realised it was coming from me. It felt like my emotional agony had also taken on a form of physical pain. It felt as if my heart and soul were being torn apart. Piece by piece. Leaving me dead inside. All I could do was cry and scream.

The people around me looked scared, worried and unsure of what to do. They just stood there watching me die inside. I couldn't move. Endless sobs were racking through my body. Every time I closed my eyes all I could do was imagine Dimitri laying in a pool of blood on the cold hard ground, all alone. Waiting for strigoi to come back and take his body to drain later.

But I couldn't let that happen. I pulled myself together enough to stop the heart wrenching sobs. I was now silent. Still on the ground.

Eventually, I managed to gather enough strength to stand up. I just stood there, in silence, waiting. Waiting for the moment where I was ready to run back to the caves and stay with him. I had to see him again. They said he was dead but what if there was a chance he was just unconscious and weak. It would be better than dead.

However, if that was the case, then he needed not to be alone when he woke up. I couldn't bear the thought of him alone. I would go and sit by him. Until the recovering team came to collect the bodies. and if he is alive I will stay with him until he is moved.

Everyone was staring at me; Alberta, Stan, my mother, Yuri and Emil. I would have told them to go and be safe but then I would be dragged back with them.

The longer I stay the more energy I gather. Once I know I can at the least walk then I will know if I can run. If I can run back to my lover, my partner, my heart, my soul because I can't  live without him.

I slowly try to walk, slow steps, it takes me a minute but I do, bracing myself for the sight I'm about to see. It scares me senseless. To know my soul-mate might very well be dead. The pain I feel right now can't be put into words. I wish I could curl up in a ball and die.

But I need to pull myself together and be strong. For Dimitri and myself. I wipe the tears away from my face and take more steps forwards toward the group of guardians in front of me. I feel a lone traitorous tear creep out of the corner of my eye.

I am surprised at what happens next though. Stan steps forward and engulfs me in a hug. It's weird but it's kind of comforting. After a couple of seconds I relax into the hug. I feel the tears welling up in my eyes again. I shake trying to keep the tears from escaping. The next thing that comes out of Stan's mouth takes me over the edge again and I breakdown for the second time in 10 minutes. "Rose it's okay let it all out. I can't imagine the pain you are going through. Since you came to this academy I've always felt the need to protect you. You may hate me but I see you as family. You have grown up so much and I've had the pleasure of witnessing it. I saw how you were acting and I have always seen your potential and that's why I used to get angry when you give out attitude and be unkind. But know I'm always here okay. Shhh its all okay let it out. I'm here." I've never seen this side of Stan. I vowed I would treat him differently from now on.