Chapter 24- Control

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AN:Hello Lovelies! I missed you all. Here is another (late) chapter of #11.

My commenter of the week is @Madisona78 I appreciated your comment and devotion to the story. This chapter is for you!

WARNING: This chapter contains material that may be upsetting and sensitive to some audiences. Proceed at your own risk.

Week 14

Record 10-3

2 months since break up

Control is something that many people want, but many don't have. I haven't always had control and now whatever little bit I had was lost. Gone and I don't know when I am getting it back.

1 Day earlier

"How are you doing?" Gisele asked me as we sat around the table at the restaurant. I nodded and took another sip of my wine.

"I'm fine,"Addi rolled her eyes at my response. I wasn't fine. I had lost Julian and Luke in the past 2 months and I knew in my heart that I was still in love with Julian, but it wasn't healthy for my mind to be in a relationship with Julian. He was my drug and I needed him, but he is not good for me.

"No you aren't,"Gisele said and I closed my eyes.

"You're right. I'm not. But I am going to focus on my job and getting these boys to playoffs healthy,"I replied as I swirled my wine around in my glass.

We are close to the home stretch and the team needs me focused and not worried about my personal life.

"When was the last time that you slept?" Addi asked me and I shrugged. I had been researching different ways to speed up muscle recovery without the use of drugs. Within the past couple of weeks I have thrown myself into looking at the nutrition side of my job. I took a couple of nutrition classes in college and I enjoyed the, but I always focused more on the trainer aspect of my schooling.

Now I am seeing how the nutrition and sports are connected. How what the players put into their bodies can help them play longer and recover better.

"I have slept here and there,"I tried to convince them and they shook their heads.

"This is not healthy. We are worried about you Abs. You look like a dead woman walking,"Gisele told me as she took a bite of her chicken salad the waiter had set down in front of us.

"I am fine. I have been doing some research and that's why I am so tired," I explained and they both dropped it.

"Are you all excited for playoffs?"Addi asked a smile lighting up her face. Adii may just be Tom's publicist, but she was as involved in the team as any NFL Wife.

"Yes, but no words can describe the level of excitement the boys have. They feel that they are something special this year,"As soon as I said this I grimaced. A pain ripping through my abdomen.

"Abs are you okay?"Gisele noticed me tensing up. I just nodded as the pain passed.

"Yeah must just be my time of the month,"I joked and took another bite of my salad forcing myself to swallow it because I suddenly wasn't hungry.

"That sucks. Mine was super bad last month."

"I'll deal with it just like I deal with everything else." We fell into silence and ate our meals just as I felt another pain shoot through me.

An hour later I was barely able to keep my face passive as cramp after cramp seized my lower abdomen and back. I have had bad periods before but this takes the cake. I moaned in pain under my breath as Addi glanced at me worriedly.

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