Unsaid Things

First Day

Today was my first day as a junior and it went amazing. I love all of my classes and everyone is pretty cool. We have 3 new exchange students, Nina, Iris, and Liam. They are all so nice and I can't wait to get to know them better.
         We had about 15 minutes in each class and then we had a HS meeting in the auditorium, then it was off to our class meetings. In our class meeting I sat next to him. I'd tap his foot with mine once in awhile which would spark the playful response "fight me" so I'd nudge you and we'd go on like that till we were leaning on eachother. Then we went out to the truck and got some o your stuff and walked to the other side of the school. I honestly had a lot of fun, and we're gonna hang out tomorrow after school. I can't wait because I haven't hung out with you since like April and I miss it.
         I'm fine being friends with you because I know it'll never be what it used to be. You're one of the best people I know and I love being close with you. Everyone says you're a toxic friend and that I should just leave you but... Somehow I can't bring myself to do it. I don't know why I stay but I do. I guess it might be because I promised you Freshmen year that I'd never leave, that I'd always be here if you needed anything. And I want to keep that promise. I never want to grow apart from you. 
        We share a special bond, Ethan, part of me wonders what you think of him or if you think of him at all. I'd like to think you do but I'm not sure. You asked if we were bringing him to the rodeo and when I said yes, you seemed visibly excited. I can't help but wonder if you miss him... If you miss the family we used to be. Ya know? I know it's silly to think about, but I do. 
        I watched a few of the videos you have up on youtube and they are all pretty cool. It just makes me that much more supportive for your riding. I love watching you, I'm always on the edge of my seat because I'm scared and excited for you. I want you to be the best there is, but I also want you to stay safe. 
        I love spending time with you, I just wish we got to do it more often. I am glad that you're at least coming to school at HHS. I thought you were going to be homeschooled and I hated that thought. But I'm glad you're there with us. I'm excited to see where things go for us. Maybe... We could even go to Prom together...

~Unsaid things to my ex