Facing the World

Chapter 9- Orchards

I look out the window as Johnathan drives around in the parking lot. We come to a stop when we find a place to park. “Alright lets go."  When we go in to Safeway, a beautiful orchard catches my eye. Its purple with dark purple stains all around the petal. He notices my glance at the flower and says, “What's wrong, are you okay?" he looks at me with worry. I chuckle, “I'm fine. I'm just looking at the flowers." “Oh, okay. Come on let's go get some pancake mix!" he said excitedly. I laugh at his immaturity. I shake my head. “Okay let's go." I grab his hand and entwine our fingers as I swing them back and forth. When we go to the checkout area, we put up milk and pancake mix. The lady who's checking the items looks at us and smiles. “What an adorable couple! I can tell you guys are gonna be together for a longtime." Jonathan's taken back by what she said. “ I- I um, I have to go to the bathroom. be right back." He speeds off fast walking. “Oh, ha um we're not dating." “Oh, he your brother." “Uh, no we're just friends." she laughs loudly, grabbing my hands and putting them to her chest. “Oh baby girl, you can tell by the way he looks at you, he's falling deep in love. You keep your eye on that. Okay, sweetheart  that'll be $12.25." I give her the money and then I notice her facial features. She has grey, curly hair, glasses, and wrinkled hands, which were soft and cold. “Have a good day!" “You too, ma'am." when I walk to the exit, I see him with his hands rubbing his head like he has a headache. “Hey I cleared it up with her. You didn't have to run off like that." when I say that, I immediately want to take it back. A wave of hurt flashes his eyes. “Sorry. Next time I'll just leave and come back laughing. Is that what you want?" “Fine. Let's go." This makes me angry for some reason. Do I want him to be happy that people think we're a couple? Embarrassed? Do I want him to like me? I'm not sure, but as these thoughts run through my mind Johnathan says something that I couldn't catch but I'm to confused and angry at him for asking. When we get into the car, Hello by Evanescence started playing one of my favorite songs from them. I huff and strap my seat belt then turn to look at him. “Fine I'm sorry I snapped at you in the god forsaken store!" he laughs out loud. “Ha! Its okay, I'm sorry too. For being so sensitive." we start laughing then we immediately stop when we meet each other's gaze. Playground school bell rings, again. Rain clouds come to play again. Has no one told you shes not breathing? Hello I'm your mind giving you someone to talk to. Hello, if I smile and don't believe soon I know I wake from this dream. Don't try to fix me I'm not broken. Hello. Then I do the unthinkable which I might regret later. I kiss him on the lips ever so softly.