Heaven

Freak

I was my own destruction. I was my own enemy, the only weapon that could destroy me was myself.

I close my eyes and breathe in deeply, feeling my powers surge through me and the wind pick up around me, blowing through my hair.

It felt nice. The coldness against my skin, it was relaxing.

I'm not sure what I was doing, I wasn't good with putting my feelings into words, so I don't talk about it.

But inside was a whirlwind of emotions dancing around while tainting me, draining all of my remaining energy.

I felt so alone.

No one understood what I was going through, I was the only vampire in this town and that sucked because that meant I had to go through this all on my own.

I knew nothing but was expected to learn control when I didn't understand everything completely.

Sighing I place my mug down on the bench while looking around, "Della?" A voice says from behind me and I spun around, coming face to face with Graylen.

"It's always confusing, I sometimes forget your first name is Della and Iliana is your middle name," She says with a small smile.

She takes a seat across from me and chewed her bottom lip, "I just wanted to check up on you, see if you were okay," She says, her voice coming out soft.

My stomach twisted into knots and I bite my lip to keep from croaking out, "I'm fine, just taking baby steps," I say, forcing a smile onto my face.

Sadness flickered through her eyes and she grabbed my hand, "It'll be alright baby, mistakes are bound to be made, they don't define you," She says and I shook my head, pulling my hand away from hers.

"But they do define us, after we've made the same bad ones over and over again fully knowing the outcome - yet we still do it." I retort.

I throw my thermos back in my bag before standing up, throwing it over my shoulder, "It changes you," I add on in a small voice.

"Every road leads back to place I know I can't go, it's like there's this darkness calling for me," I say.

"It calls out, scratching and clawing to get to the surface, and I won't be able to hold it back much longer," I state, shaking my head before leaving her there.

I walk back inside the school and grab my books for my next class before heading toward the library for the remaining lunch period.

This was going to be a long day.

_____________________________

"This town seems to attract many supernatural things,"

I turn and look at Francis with a deadpanned expression and wandered through the woods along the stream. It was past midnight and the temperature was dropping but I was out here in just a night gown.

The cold didn't seem to bother me much anymore and it kind of scared me a bit.

Francis wanders off while I scope out the area, I could hear the water crashing fast and the wind pick up around me.

I wasn't sure if it was because of me or if there was a storm coming.

My hair flowed around my face as I squinted, taking in my surroundings. I fall to the ground when something struck my body.

I cried out while crawling backwards away from whatever was hiding in the darkness.

"Come on kid, just go home before something bad happens," Francis says, causing me to snort out.

"You can leave, Ill head home in a bit," I say, he grumbles before disappearing, leaving me there.

The moonlight shined bright and stars were scattered across the night sky, it was beautiful in a tragic way.

I always wanted to go to space growing up, I wanted to touch the stars because I've never seen anything more beautiful than those bright little lights.

They captured me whole and always made me feel like I wasn't so alone in this great big world.

I shook my head while looking around.

It started raining yet I still stood in my spot, never once flinching from the coldness.

I wipe the hair out of my face and close my eyes, taking in a deep breath before sitting down.

I place my hands on my knees and keep my eyes shut as I listen to the wind flow through the trees and the rain pelt against the leaves.

It made me feel alive.

There were times like this that I loved being alive, even if life was terrifying.

It feels like I'm either stuck in a daydream or nightmare, Im never sure.

I'm so use to living in the light so when darkness came it consumed me.

I see all this magic around me, but I'm too messed up to control it. I can't control the magic, I can't control myself.

I've been searching my whole life for something, something to help me along the way.

I never had much of a childhood, I never had a steady life and deep down I'm sill a child. But I've lost all hope, I'm too messed up.

The wind picked up and the rain pelted down harder around me, soaking my hair and night gown. I felt like I couldn't go on, all I wanted was to lie hear and let the rain consume me.

Let Mother Nature take care of my mass destruction.

My hair whipped around me and my eyes remained shut. Some say you have to look for the rainbow after the storm but in my case there never was a rainbow - because the storm still hasn't stopped.

I cry out, "Why me?" I cry out when thunder cracked through the night sky.

I should have come with a warning label because I was deadly without trying.

There was something deeper going on with me and I had to get to the bottom of it before I destroy myself and everyone around me.

I felt like a prisoner in my own body. They always say you're happy ending is up to you - but what if you were never meant to have one?