Part One | 11

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Chapter 11

"Once I'd said yes to staying with Marie, I'd said yes to leaving everything behind. I knew that no matter what, Marie was leaving with or without me. She wasn't going to stay, especially if her parents had kicked her out, and I couldn't find any will in me to leave her. I knew if I did that I'd regret it for the rest of my life.

It's all a blur now, but we got out of there as soon as possible. I can't remember what I was thinking. I can't remember if I thought running away was crazy or not. I do remember being scared. I remember wondering if I'd regret it all in the future.

A part of me didn't want to leave just yet, but I knew that Marie couldn't stay there any longer. She wanted to get out. She had to get out. I was all she had. She needed me. And I wasn't going to let her go alone."

...

Marie hid in my room the next three days as we planned our running away together. It was easy keeping her in my room. We'd done it for months. If Gale knew she was there, she didn't say anything like usual. She had gotten used to Marie being in my room. If she did know, she probably didn't think anything of it, but I don't think she ever knew. Even when Gale went to work, Marie just hung around until I got home. 

It was weird talking to Gale as if I had no plans on completely disappearing in a matter of days. I knew that she had no idea. We talked as if nothing was wrong. Even Paolo didn't see anything wrong, and though I tried desperately to keep it all in me, I was shaking whenever I thought about them finding out.

I embraced my final dinner with them, trying to experience everything I possibly could. The thing was was that I may have hated living in Middleborough. I may have really hated having Gale as a parent again when I felt so abandoned by her, but things had begun to start changing. Even though I was still planning on leaving, I wasn't planning on doing it without a trace. 

I knew that with Marie and I running away I'd probably never see Gale again. I'd most definitely never see Paolo again, and even though I wasn't close with them at all, I still felt pain in the idea that Marie and I were all each other had. It was us against the world and it was horrifying how true that felt. 

Gale made pasta on my last night. She made pasta and it tasted delicious. I'd never taste her pasta again. That thought was weird. I watched as she laughed with Paolo, barely paying attention to the TV show on the screen of our television. I tried to remember what she looked like, because now the tables have turned. It will be me leaving, not her. It will be me not keeping in touch. It will be me acting as if our relationship never existed.

And although I felt almost no closeness with Paolo, I thought I'd miss his eager attempts at getting to know me. I'd miss his really stupid jokes and awkward tries at making conversation. I remembered at that moment how he tried to talk to me about Marie, trying to get me to learn how romance works. I almost laughed. As much as it hurt to admit it, I knew that I would really miss them.

Earlier today, I took out all the money I had from the bank and bought two duffle bags for clothes and other necessities Marie and I would need. While I did that, Marie went back to her house and took some extra money. I wasn't sure if it was hers, but Marie didn't have a job so I figured it wasn't. I grew worried that maybe her parents would call the police, but either they just didn't care to do anything or they hadn't noticed the money gone just yet. 

We had been preparing the last few days carefully, but now came the hard part.

While Marie showered, I sat at my desk with a single piece of paper and a pencil in hand. I hadn't written anything yet, mostly because I didn't know what to say. It could've been the fact that I was exhausted from work or the fact that it's one in the morning. It could've even been the overwhelming guilt I'd been experiencing all week. I didn't know. 

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