STAR BLOSSOM | JUNGKOOK [HIATUS]

「038」

I want to ask her out, but it's way too early to do that. Besides, Yoonbyul totally hates me, she'll totally think that I'm insane if I ask her now. Ugh why are you shaking up my heart? Just how exactly did dad ask mom out? Why do I have none of his genes for 'relationship confidence' or whatever it's called? 

How do I start this conversation before annoying Yoonbyul with suspense? I want to be your oppa? What the fuck, I can't just say that! Even if I finally got the chance to be alone with her, I can't just jump to that. I bite my lip before thinking of something else to say.

"How should I change for you?" I say in my mind as a thought but then realizing that I said it out loud.

"How should I change.. for you? What the fuck Haneul, how random can you get?" mocked Yoonbyul, "What is it that you really want to say to me?"

I gulp in fear, I'm getting nervous again. An idea comes to my head and I reach into my pocket to pull out a picture.

"Here," I mumble as I pushed the item closer to Yoonbyul.

"What is this? A picture?" questioned Yoonbyul as she looked at the picture's content in detail, "Wait... is this you? You're so small here."

She laughs and I laugh back, "Yeah it i-"

"Hold on, this is the picture you dropped in your dorm last time!"

"You saw it?"

"Only for a brief moment, no wonder why you quickly grabbed it back," laughed Yoonbyul, "Is this your father?"

I look at the area Yoonbyul was pointing to, "Yes, that's my father."

Yoonbyul moves her thumb off of the other side of the picture, "Haneul... is this... me and my father? How? I- I just noticed, I've known you for this long..?" exclaimed Yoonbyul who looked at me with serious eyes, "Tell me Haneul, when was this taken!?"

"You don't remember!? But-" I notice teardrops on top of the table and looked up to see Yoonbyul crying.

"Why didn't you tell me Haneul? Why didn't you tell me that you knew me at this age!?" 

"I never got the chance, it's kind of a long story... an embarrassing story..."

"HANEUL LOOK AT ME. WHEN EXACTLY WAS THIS PICTURE TAKEN?" shouted Yoonbyul with rage as she suddenly held me by the collar.

"When we were both six years old... that's when the picture was taken!" I gulp in fear again.

Yoonbyul abruptly lights up with pure motivation as a couple drops of her tears fall, "I've finally remembered something! I'm a few steps closer to figuring out my past!"

"Wh- what do you mean Yoonbyul?" I asked with confusion.

"I don't just tell anyone about this, but since we somehow have known each other for this long, I guess I can trust you for once..." said Yoonbyul, "You see, I don't remember anything after this accident I was in when I was six. It was a specific accident that I don't remember. I've been in many accidents, but this one accident I believe has to do with water..."

"Water accidents... like the ocean?"

"Possibly... I really don't remember anything after this picture was taken, and this might be the last picture that I have of my father and I."

"Does that mean your father is..."

"Yes, he's dead."

"I'm so sorry for your loss."

"It's alright, it's been more than a decade since that happened," replied Yoonbyul, "Do you think I can have a copy of this picture?"

"Of course! Actually, you can have it," I say as I hand Yoonbyul the picture.

"Thank you Haneul. You're not as bad as you were before, and just because we were close when we were younger doesn't mean I'll be nicer to you. Besides, I don't remember a single about me and you being friends," Yoonbyul laughs.

"Understood."

"And can you hurry up and leave now?" yawned Yoonbyul, "I need to go to sleep."

I quickly pack up my things while Yoonbyul said goodbye to her manager. We both walk back to the dorms together. I take a quick look at Yoonbyul. I wish I could forget all of this, so that I don't have to act like an idiot in front of Yoonbyul again. If she doesn't remember, then what's the point of me remembering? I guess I should just leave this first love bullshit behind me. 

Just before Yoonbyul and I stepped inside the school building, some bright headlights covered the whole entrance. The vehicle's doors open in front of us, revealing seven boys, one of them being Jungkook.