The Phoenix Awards

Round Three - Critiques

For those of you who weren't mentioned in the previous chapter where the more general results where posted, here are your results:

As always, please remember that this is based on our personal opinions which are subjective and that any changes made to the subject in question of this round might not have been taken into consideration depending on when your book was judged.

C R I T I Q U E S

(in a random order)

MarcusBrutus1 - The Patterns of Darkness

MartaxSofia - Your story was off to a good start. It was very formal but managed to work well. However, you took a lot of dialogue between characters nobody knows as a starting point which is something extremely hard to pull off. The back and forth between them did shed some light on what the world you built was like and the pacing of the conversation itself made sense.

AlyssaAfrica - Perierat

MartaxSofia - Your pacing was good but it felt lacking in the spark department. It's odd how the Chancellor just happened to be so darn close and know her. I felt like the spark wasn't there.

-kyavhill - Society

MartaxSofia - The pace is nice and the spark is somewhat there but there is a certain agressiveness that is missing. How can he not like being questioned and there not be any description of it? You need to work on those a bit but otherwise it's good.

OnceUponAPineapple - Z Squared

MartaxSofia - I really liked your pace but I felt like the spark wasn't quite noticeable. The letter was great, amazingly written but then her morning routine left me wondering what it was there for...

LunarsFantasies - Archive of Aswa: Coil of Gold

MartaxSofia - You took your story to the right place in terms of the pacing  and the content seems fitting but, and quoting Marie Kondo, it doesn't spark joy, not on me.

zuko_42 - The Right to Rule

MartaxSofia - I liked what I read, it suited this round's criteria but I didn't quite love it. It's hard to explain, really, so I'm sorry I'm not being that helpful but your book is a good one and I honestly can't think of a single thing you should change about it.

Alicia20M - Taste of Italy

MartaxSofia - The scenario you started with was something we all know and struggle with but that wasn't what was being judged. The pacing seemed right but the spark wasn't quite there for me. The 'breathe, breathe' was intriguing but otherwise it was simply a close-to-home kind of situation.

Druidrose - Rogue Assassin

MartaxSofia - Your prologue's pacing was good, the story seemed fine with it but there was no immediate connecting to the characters. The spark was very dim which isn't ideal, especially with a book as dramatic and action-full as yours seems.

Thank you for participating, hopefully our feedback will in some way help you and we'll see you all in the next round!