𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐌 ❪ SHAWN MENDES ❫

⁰⁵⁹ 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦

TRIGGER WARNING; suicidal thoughts, drug abuse, suicide.
( please skip this chapter if these subjects are hard for you! sending my love to you <3 )

SOPHIE

I don't know what to do anymore. I'm so hurt and so confused.

I'm sitting in my bathroom, sobbing. I can't do it anymore. It is too much. I look at my hand where a lot of pills are laying in.

What have I done with my life that I'm sitting here, in my apartment, at the point of killing myself? I let out a sob when I think of my life. My mom, dad and sister who are amazing. My amazing friends. My amazing career that is possible because of my amazing fans. Martijn, the most amazing brother I could ever wish for. Shawn, the person who I love so so much.

I just can't anymore. I swallow all of the pills and after a few seconds, I regret it. How weak am I?

I hear my front door open. "Soph? Soph, where are you?" I hear Martijn say. I want to scream, "help me! Come quick please." But I'm too tired.

My eyelids are heavy and I can't stand on my feet anymore, my legs are giving up. I fall on the ground and my head hits the ground. Black spots are forming in front of my eyes

Martin bounces on the door. "Little one? Are you in there? Please, open the door." My vision blurs.

Martijn has enough and kicks the door in and kneels next to me. "Soph? O my God, I'm calling 112*." He talks to the person on the other side of the phone but I don't listen, I can't hear it clearly. I'm too tired.

"Little one? Sweetie, what did you do?" I hear him asking. He sounds like he's crying. My vision blurs more and then black.

Goodbye

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*112 is the emergency line in the Netherlands.

**If you need any help, visit 13reasonswhy.info. It provides crisis information and resources to help you.