Chapter Three

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Rain, puddles, falling, dying...

I woke up suddenly. The same terrifying nightmare.

I had gone to bed all cosy and happy and secure with my loving thoughts.

I thought about the message last night. My face warmed when I remembered the words.

"Loved our talk. Can't wait to see you tomorrow Britt. 😉"

It had lulled me into a false sense of comfort.

I woke up feeling frightened, scared and lonely again.

I hugged my legs close to me.

This morning was different. I had Zac waiting for me to walk me to school. I had something to look forward to.

Zac was outside my house as promised and we started chatting animatedly. I was concerned that things might have been awkward but he was so charming it felt so easy to talk to him.

I had to keep my feelings in check though. Besides him touching my hand yesterday he had not given any indication that we had anything beyond a friendship. Still part of me couldn't help longing for something more.

The weeks seemed to pass so fast and Zac and I walked to and from school everyday. I introduced him to the special places around town. We had become so close. Life was lovely. The only thing that marred it was my growing feelings for Zac. I couldn't deny it anymore. I was seriously falling for him.

Yes. I admit it. I was falling for him. Me and every other eligible girl in school. He had no shortage of admirers. We usually ate lunch together, the whole gang, Mark and Gina, Talia and whoever her latest guy was. Still it didn't stop the girls from hanging around and believe me they did.

It seemed weird. It was if they always had a way of sitting between Zac and I. He was ever so considerate. The girls would fall under his spell. I mean who wouldn't when he flashed his dimpled smile. They were enchanted. When they asked him out, he would politely refuse them leaving them bewildered. As soon as one left, another girl was eager to fill her place.

Having lunch at school one day, Mark piped up.

"Hey mate. Why is it that you have so many girls around you all the time, yet you don't have a girlfriend? You got a secret lover hidden around here somewhere?"

Zac just ran his hand through his hair and said,"Nah. There is one girl that I like but I'm too shy to say anything. I don't know if she likes me back."

"You shy! You have the entire female population after you. If I was you, I'd be going out with a different girl everyday!"

"Really Mark. A different girl everyday huh?"

Gina stared daggers at her boyfriend.

"Umm of course I meant if I was single. Seriously. Umm. Gina you know I love you don't you."

"Hmmmm."

Mark looked sheepish. He knew he put his foot into it. Gina couldn't help but crack a smile at his sad expression.

"You can make it up by buying me some flowers. Pink roses are my favourite." 

I sneaked a look over at Zac. He seemed relieved that the conversation had steered away from him. This was probably the first time I had seen him look so uncomfortable. I couldn't help thinking about this girl he liked. Do I dare to believe it could be me? It couldn't be. Surely he would have said something by now.

"Hey guys, I have some exciting news!"

Talia broke the silence with her trademark bubbly voice.

"Ok I'm the last person to say this but I have to admit it. I've fallen in love. Head over heels, falling down the stairs in love! His name is Jackson and he is just gorgeous."

My mouth opened wide. Talia? In love? Surely not. This was the girl who loved to party. Liked to keep her options open. She always told me everything. How could I not know this?

"He goes to a school in the next town. We met at the supermarket when I went to get an orange from the display and the whole lot started rolling down the aisle. He helped me pick up all the oranges and we had a good laugh about it afterwards. We have been inseparable since then."

Talia continued, her eyes sparkling.

"Let's all go out to the movies this weekend. It will be fun to date in a group and you can all meet Jackson."

My felt my face blush. Mark and Gina were a couple. Jackson and Talia were a couple but Zac and me? I didn't know what we were. We spent a lot of time together mucking around and talking but nothing else had happened. I thought of Zac bringing another girl to the movies and I started to blink to hold back the tears. Dammit. Why did I react this way?

"Sure Brittany and I are in. That is if you are are ok with this?"

He turned towards me giving me his trademark smile.

I nodded my head silently. Maybe there was something else there. Dare I dream.

"So what is the deal with you two? Are you going out or what??" Talia asked with slight exaggeration.

"Nah. Brittany and I are good pals. Best of mates. Ain't that right Britt?"

"Sure. Best pals." My voice said the words calmly but my insides were crying.

Talia gave me a consoling look. I had spoken to her constantly about my feelings for Zac over the past several weeks. She knew everything. My hopes, my dreams. My stupid fantasies.

I couldn't blame him. He hadn't given me any romantic indicators at all. I swallowed hard trying to stifle the lump forming in my throat.

"Hey guys. I'm not feeling so great. I'm going to get a sick pass and go home."

I just needed to get out of there. Talia's eyes were wide with concern. I could see the expression, "I'll call you" written all over her face.

"Brittany. Are you ok?"

Zac grabbed my hand as if to console me. Damn it. Didn't he realise that was the last thing I needed right now.

"I'm fine. Just a headache. I just need to rest."

I grabbed my books and started heading to the nurses office. I could hear Zac calling my name but I couldn't turn around. Tears were running uncontrollably down my face, my heart heavy with sorrow.

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