Numbers and scars | | Joshler ]√[

Cause and Effect

*****This chapter may be shorter, and will be mostly about Josh, I've kinda been ignoring him and I don't want to do that. So here we have more on how this is affecting Josh.****

Josh POV

"Tyler! What did you do!"

I remove the towel to get a better look at the source of all the blood, but quickly put it back realizing that it was the only thing keeping him alive. As I try to lift him up, his voice ran across my ear.

"I'm sorry."

I look down at him as tears start making their way down my own face. I hit his cheek lightly as his eyes began to roll.

"Focus on my voice, Ty."

I finally got him in my arms and carried him to the front of the bus. I crank up the bus, Tyler laying in my lap. I decided to take him a block over back to the Institution.

"Help! Please! Someone!"

I ran through the front doors, carrying a pale boy in my arms, and covered in his blood. I saw doctor William run down the hall towards us, followed by two men in scrubs with a stretcher. That damned stretcher, it always meant me and Tyler would be separated.

"Josh, what happened?"

Doctor William pulled me aside while Tyler was taken once again.

"He-he cut himself... He wasn't trying to kill himself it just....the cut was to deep...he called out for me..."

Tears fell from my eyes as I struggled to put the story together, panic resting in my stomach.

"Is he going to be taken away again?"

I look up at him finally with pained brown eyes.

"Yes. He will stay here under suicide watch and we will call you with more information."

He rested a hand on my shoulder.

"I could give you a number to a therapist, I know this can't be easy."

I shook my head.

"I'm fine Doctor, thank you for the offer."

He nods and walks away, leaving me alone again. I was anything but fine. My anxiety was getting worse, and no one was around to help me. I mean, yeah I had Mark and Ben, but I only really liked to talk to Tyler about stuff like that...

Later that night, I was laying in my bed, thinking, waiting for the doctor to call me. Thinking, thinking, thinking. I felt my throat get tighter, and I tried to stand before the anxiety attack hit me.

"He tried to kill himself! You couldn't help him, all you're doing is making him worse!" 

Everything is spinning, my lungs being constricted by my ribs, squeezing tighter and tighter and tighter.

"No one cares about you Josh. No one. All you do is hurt and annoy!"