Better Than Me

Chapter 27

A/N: Settle in guys, because this is a long one and we've finally reached the moment of truth. And to those of you who have read Better Than Revenge, yes, there are significant changes to this chapter as well, all for the sake of building a better character that doesn't deserve to be locked up for what he did.

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Chapter 27

She didn't say anything. Sophia stood there and stared at me like I'd finally lost it, like I was about to pull a Britney and attack her car with an umbrella after shaving my head. By the horrified look on her face, I figured she thought I was going to shave hers, too, and maybe Blake's and Tori's while I was at it.

God, why had I said it? I should have kept my damn mouth shut. And honestly, "Because somehow, my annoyance with you turned into something else." Could I have sounded any lamer? What kind of a confession was that? I was losing my touch.

When she did speak, all she said was, "What?"

"I don't know what happened, but I care about you," I continued, trying my best to sound sincere without completely scaring her off. I was balancing on a fine line, one that could break at any moment. "I care about you a lot, Soph, and to tell you the truth, it scares me a little."

She went quiet again, and the more I waited for her to say something, the more it pained me. I couldn't help the expression that crossed my face; it was one that probably communicated exactly what I was feeling. Hurt and terrified, because I had a feeling she was about to rip my heart out and stomp on it.

I just needed to hear her say something – anything. Even if it was something about my face breaking a mirror or reminding her of an exhibit at the zoo. Even if it was at my expense and she caught it on video and uploaded it to Facebook. I would've done anything to hear her voice instead of seeing the confused and upset look in her eyes.

"Say something," I finally said, trying not to look so pathetically nervous and failing miserably. I didn't even need to see myself to know I looked like a pussy.

She stood there and stared at me like she was trying to figure me out but still wouldn't say anything. Her hand lifted upwards, towards her temple like my confession was actually giving her a headache. She shook her head, leading my thoughts into an endless spiral. Why did she shake her head? What was that supposed to mean? "Oh, God, my weird costar has a crush on me?" Or maybe "How am I going to tell him I'm not interested?" Or maybe if I was lucky, "I think I'm in the same boat and kinda want to take his pants off?"

Alright, I was over-analyzing things. Christ, I was turning into my mother. What was Sophia doing to me? I'd never been on this side of the spectrum – the side where you have to throw yourself out there and hope you don't sink – but so far, it fucking sucked. I'd never been in the position where being rejected was even a remote possibility.

"I know you must think I'm lying or that this can't possibly be true, but I'm not. My feelings changed. I care about you, Soph... more than I thought was possible."

I took a step closer, and the good news was that she didn't flinch or move away from me. The bad news was what came out of her mouth next. "This is a joke, right? This is another one of your pranks, and I guess Tori and Blake are in on this one. Real funny, guys. If my hands weren't numb right now, I'd clap for you guys."

A joke? She couldn't honestly believe I would joke around about this. Okay, yes, I'd given her reason to doubt me – plenty of reason, to be fair – but I wouldn't go this far. Maybe when we were in the midst of our prank war or whatever the hell that was, but not now. Now, I wanted nothing more than for her to give me a chance and let me kiss her again, let me feel her soft lips moving against mine every day, for as long as she'd let me. Oh, God, I sounded like I belonged in one of my mom's sappy rom-coms.