Darling Won't You Stay?~ Jonnor Mcball Fanfic

Your Decision

All their eyes being on me, giving me the feeling of nervousness and it was making it very difficult to look at all their faces, to say the words that Con told me to say. 

"Hey Brad, where is Connor?" that was the first question coming from my manager, the one question that I was dreading for him to ask, and for me to answer. 

Having his eyes on me, it was very difficult for me to tell him what I need to say. 

"Uh, he's in his room. He is not feeling very well." I still found a way to tell him, playing with my hair nervously, thinking they won't believe me.

And then a worried-faced James, then began  to question me, with a worried tone as well, looking at me.

"Is he okay? Why isn't he feeling well?"

If only you knew.

I couldn't think of anything at the moment, but I just said something right on the  spot that first crossed my head. 

"Uh, he has a headache and his stomach hurts." I say hesitantly, trying to sound surely of what I was talking about, but I feel like i didn't due to my expression and me scratching my neck awkwardly and nervously. 

"Don't you think that the boy could handle it?" Joe had his bothered tone on, and you could tell he was bothered because of the way he looked and asked, while looking at me. 

"Trust me Joe, he looks terrible. He can't handle it." I assured our tall brunette-headed manager that my bandmate was not feeling good whatsoever, and that he just needs to rest. 

I threw a little look at him, that was showing that the blue-eyed was "not feeling well" because of the oldest guitar player sitting in this very room, gesturing my gaze to upstairs then to James without him noticing, and that is when Joe nodded meaning he understood. 

He supports James and Connor if they were in a relationship as well, but he rather say nothing and keep it to himself. 

"I'm going to go check on him." Jems didn't have to think at all for him to get up, and claim that he was going to see the boy he didn't knew that was hiding underneath his bed blanket, droplets running down from his eyes, and had a heart now that needs healing. 

But before he could do exactly what he wanted to do, I made him come to a halt  with my hand and he just looked at me with a confused look like saying, "Brad what are you doing?". 

"He really wants to be alone, you know. For the pain he is having to go away." I made up an excuse for him not to see the younger guy, even if it wasn't an excuse and the truth of him having pain. 

I don't know if this emotional pain can be healed though. 

This pain can't be healed, but it does need to heal. 

"I want to see him, that's all." I could see the hurt in his eyes while he was telling me this, but he doesn't know the person he wants to see is hurting too. 

I wish he did though. 

"I know you do, but I think we need to give him some space, so he can rest."  I calmly and politely told the tallest and oldest lad that was facing me, without wanting to tell him rudely because a little bit it's his fault for Con's fragile state right now.

I could tell that he didn't like it because he then turned his gaze to our manager, maybe in hopes that he would back him up, but he was not doing that, instead he agreed with me.

"Brad has a point, we should let him rest."

Having a bothered face on, he didn't say nothing then, so he took his place back on the couch, now silent looking at all three of us.

Going to take my seat on the couch too, I sat down ready for whatever is going to happen and be said in this conversation.

Joe started off by saying, "So, Tristan has told me that you modeled today for Calvin Klein. That is very fantastic James, congratulations." he gave a warming smile to the maybe-model-to-be, before pausing a little and continuing  what he has to say. 

My boyfriend and I kept quiet for now, wondering how this is all going to go down from here, watching the tanned-skinned boy smile nervously, and our manager that is handling this situation quite well.

"But he has also told me that she offered you a modelling job, again that is great." having a smile on, he was taking this good, and it was worrying me, I could sense Tris too due to the look on his face. 

"Also that it is in California." when he mentioned that last part, his smiley expression was no more, it faltered, and that is when I knew things are going to go downhill from here. 

Having all our eyes on James now, he showed sadness and guilt, so that is when he spoke. 

"I know. And I know your going to say that how am I even debating on which decision I should make because I'm the one who started this band basically, and that I am letting the fans down if I leave the band, especially since we are going on tour in 5 days."

"I am sorry if I am letting you three down and Connor, also that I am being selfish. I didn't expect for this to happen, but like I said, I felt something being behind that camera. I just don't want to make a decision if I do end up deciding to go, to feel like I am abandoning you guys, and for you guys to hate me. You guys are like family to me." when he finished saying all of that, he looked like he was going to cry but also torn, and it pained me to see him like this. 

First Connor, then him. 

"James, we are not going to hate you. You are like family to us too. I may be your manager, but I'm not your father. You are old enough to make this decision on your own. This is your decision." he supported, and I was not expecting that at all.

"I'm not going to sit here and tell you to stay, I'm not going to sit here and tell you to go. Whatever you think is right, you choose. What matter is that you are enjoying what you are doing." the greenish-blue eyed man that is our manager told my conflicted friend, and I knew he really meant it, because the look in his pupils.

Not knowing the proper way to let my words come flow from my lips, I bit my tongue from any further comment.

Tristan barely started to talk and said words, but the words that were said by him caught me off guard, making me shocked.

"No matter or whatever your choice is, we will support you."

"Right Honey?" now my partner was asking, and putting me on the spot, making me question why is he doing this, considering he, James, and Joe have their eyes on me now.

I wanted to say no, I want him to stay because I don't want to see Con suffer not seeing the guy he has feelings for.

But I could only fake a grin, without speaking anything and nodding my head as if I agreed, that I had no problem with this at all.

I do though.

I calmed myself down now, because the attention was taken off from me and placed on James again now, but I didn't really want the attention on him, because I didn't want to hear what he chooses.

With his face turned back facing the front of the twenty-three year old, our manager questioned what I hoped he wouldn't. 

"So, what's your decision James?"

To Be Continued...