Silver Trickster ⚬ Barry Allen [1]

46. Devil in Me

Present

When I finally open my eyes again, I find myself laying in the bed I had stayed in at S.T.A.R. Labs, in the room they had given me when I first arrived here on this earth. It takes a moment for me to fully realize what had happened as I flutter my eyes open, the light feeling like a thousand suns.

I quickly inhale as I try to sit up, my head throbbing. A small ounce of panic starts to set in my gut before I feel a hand on my arm, and I didn't have to look to know who's it belonged to. Barry hums for me to relax as I turn my head towards him, my eyes locking on his.

"This has got to stop being a thing," he says, a small smile finding its way on his face. "I think this is the fourth or fifth time I've had to sit by your bedside waiting for you to wake up."

The panic that I had seconds ago vanishes and is replaced with those silly butterflies that I got whenever Barry was around. "You don't have to-"

"It's alright, it's actually kind of nice to just sit and think about things for awhile," he states, taking his hand back that had still been placed on my arm. "Just promise me you'll stop passing out, and getting poisoned, and getting hurt-"

"I can't promise, but I'll at least make an attempt," I grin as my hair tickles my neck a little. Barry sighs and then laughs, the air clearing a little.

After a small moment, Barry takes a deep breath. "Why didn't you put on the headphones Cisco gave you?"

I stare at him for a second before answering him. "I don't know..it's just, I was the one who created her, Barry. I was the person who made her into the person she is; I made her into Black Siren. I hate Hunter for making the person that I am, and I guess now I'm just realizing that I was that person to her. I was the one thing that turned her into a monster, just like how Hunter turned me into one."

Barry doesn't hesitate as he places his hand onto mine instead of my arm this time. "You aren't a monster, alright? What he did to you doesn't matter anymore. What matters is now-"

"But what about Laurel?" I counter-ask, feeling that burning feeling in the back of my throat. "She's too far gone now, there's no way in saving her."

He sits there in silence for a moment. "What you did to Laurel wasn't you. It was him, okay? It was Zoom getting into your head. You can't go around blaming yourself forever for something like that, especially if that blame is going to get you hurt. Everyone is capable of saving, Raven. Even Laurel."

I knew he was right. Blaming myself was something I was growing quite used to now, and this wasn't entirely my fault. I wasn't sure if Laurel was in as deep as I had been, but hearing Barry say that she was capable of being saved gave me hope. I only hoped that he was right.

When I tune back in, I notice that Barry looked like he had something he wanted to ask me. "What?"

He shakes his head. "I was just...I was wondering what she had meant when she said that you had been the one to cast her away. What happened between the two of you?"