And You Are?

February 10th: 2017

16:12pm:
Not a lot is going on

16:23pm:
in what way?

16:23pm:
we don't talk about how we feel anymore

its at a lull 

he won't open up about his emotions

all we talk about is our days

16:23pm:

wow

height of excitement
maybe it is because of your exams?
affecting your moods and all

16:23pm:
probably
I don't know

things just haven't been the same since new year
like it feels as if there's been some big shift 
and maybe I'm just reading into it
I probably am

16:24pm:
have you talked much about April yet?
I mean, it isn't long

16:24pm:
we have been avoiding it

16:34pm:

jeez

you two are like a couple
all the crappy bits of a couple now
like you're past the honeymoon phase

when did you last skype or facetime? 

16:34pm:
about a week ago
I just haven't had anything to say or update him on
there is nothing to say

and part of me is worried I've done something wrong

16:35pm:
you said it was new years when things got weird or shifted

do you remember anything monumental about new years?

16:35pm:
barely anything
we did drink a lot that night

16:35pm:
Heh, yeah
my bad

16:35pm:
I can't help but worry
oh Flor, what do I do?

16:35pm:
I'm not sure Amy
let me think for a while okay?
I'll have a solution
always do don't I?

16:36pm:
thanks Flora
what would I do without you?

*

18:09pm:
Is this Ashton?

18:09pm:
who's this?

18:09pm:
it's Flora
I'm Amy's friend
we spoke once or twice a long time ago

18:09pm:
Hi
how did you manage to get my number?

18:09pm:
amy hasn't changed her phone password since we were starting sixth form
that was four years ago

either way I need to talk to you

18:11pm:
about?

18:11pm:
about what is going on with you and Amy

she's concerned
and her being concerned makes me concerned

18:11pm:

why is she concerned?

18:11pm:
because you two are becoming basic

there is no life when you talk

she is worried she did something wrong 

18:19pm:
oh

18:19pm:
oh????
what does oh mean?

18:19pm:
new years 

18:19pm:
did something happen on new years?
she thinks she did something that upset you

did she?

18:19pm:
kind of 

18:19pm:
if you could enlighten me that'd be swell 

18:24pm:
she told me she loved me

18:24pm:
amy said that?
she told you she loves you?

18:25pm:
I mean
She was drunk
I assumed she didn't mean it 
but no one has told me that before 

18:25pm:
ashton
she has never told anyone that
not even Liam, she thought she loved him but never said so
and trust me drunk amy is the most honest person you could meet
if she told you that, then she means it 

18:25pm:
I didn't know how to take it
its not what you expect to hear

18:26pm:
but how do you feel about her?
you don't feel the same right? hence why you've been distant.

18:26pm:
the opposite
I think, I think I love her.

18:27pm:
you love her
are you saying you love amy?

18:27pm:
yes
yes
I love her
I love her laugh when she does something clumsy
I love when she tucks her red locks behind her hair but they're too short to stay in place
when she talks about her art work with such passion
how she has been through hell and back but keeps that smile constantly
that she never sleeps but has more energy than my sister does sometimes
she cares for anyone and everyone without a second thought
I love her compassion
I love her for who she is, regardless of how she thinks of herself
I love her, Flora.

18:29pm:
Well
I said it
it is out there

18:29pm:
wow
just, Ashton.
I've never heard anyone be so sincere about anyone.
Please tell her this, tell her this tomorrow.

she needs to hear it.

the compassion and energy you love is fading fast.

18:29pm:
thank you Flora

I will speak to her later, before it gets too late for her.