And You Are?

6th December: 2016

1:35am:
hey Ash, it's early afternoon and I'm guessing (not stereotyping) that its warm
it's cold here.
actually freezing.

1:36am:
sleeping is a bit easier knowing Liam is gone.
guess I didn't tell you.
it's been a mad few days I can say.

1:39am:
I met with Liam, he was wasting my time. He didn't really believe or co-operate with what I was saying.
Then he followed me into a cafe.
When I saw him he left.
But then yesterday we got a restraining order against him.
So he can't bother me in any way anymore ever again.

1:41am:
it's weird when I think about it.
that he is now no longer going to be in my life.
I mean, I still have the permanent reminder of him but not having to see him is liberating.

1:45am:
you're probably busy.
I have class in the morning.
currently working on a new piece, coming along slowly but surely and I'll show it to you soon.
I think that is.
sometimes I just rip them up if I hate them.
bad habit I know
and wasteful.

1:46am:
I should try and sleep
but all I want to do is talk to you
It was never like this with Liam

1:50am:
I've been thinking
we should talk soon
face to face
I mean, if I'm coming to Australia in the new year I'd at least want to know you before I see you.
if that makes sense

1:56am:
sometimes I think about what you'd look like
but you can't really imagine how someone looks based on a written conversation can you?
I know that I won't be what you'd expect.

2:10am:
my face, no matter how I described it isn't as you'd expect
the mark is a lot bigger
more dull
but still there nonetheless
I just, I guess I'm nervous
as this takes the internet aspect and anonymity away

2:12am:
honestly what am I saying?
I think this new lease, away from Liam has brought out the better in me
after all this crap I can just live.
hopefully with you in my life.
someday
someday.