Taken

Chapter 1

They say history repeats itself...

Oh my god! Oh my god! Look! Someone help her! That woman's jumping from that window!! Oh my god! ....

I've played it out so many times. Were these the words coming from people screaming as the saw my mom while walking home from work along the same sidewalk she died on that afternoon, or driving by in the car, or walking to catch the bus home? Did anyone genuinely care or were they just horrified at the reality of what they were witnessing? Was there even one person at her side trying to help her? Was there a heart full of compassion for her? Did anyone shed any tears for her when seeing what she did? I hope so. I've wondered these things many times over.

The streets in Pittsburgh were busy that day as usual as there were people outside the hotel window my mother jumped from on October 5, 1981. Emergency responders found her lying there at 4:15 pm on the sidewalk and pronounced dead at 4:45pm at the hospital from blunt force injuries of the head.

She died alone, desperately trying to escape pain she couldn't take anymore. She'd given up all hope that she had fought to hang on to for so long.

She wasn't mentally ill, and sadly it's almost become a stereo type or stigma of those who commit suicide, that they were "sick" and that was the leading cause of it. No. Not all people are sick who commit suicide. And, unfortunately, that stigma is rising. That takes a huge load off guilty people who created the amount of pain that pushed someone over the edge into their own death...No. Some suicides are the result of overwhelming pain others have caused another person, like bullying, slander that results in total debilitation of one's own life, harassment, rapes, abuses...those things can and have lead people to suicide many times, as the victims are desperately needing relief from the pain and on going abuse from others...Abuse in and of itself creates a hopeless perspective in the victim that there is no way out, and sadly, that's a realty for some. Some victim's really don't have any way out and are totally alone and helpless as a result of the abuse.

Adult and child bullying, harassment, abuse among many other mistreatments people can through from other human beings, and they are serious issues. Not all make it out alive. It's that serious and real.

There is also a thing called, induced suicide. That is when others use abusive tactics and strategies through psychological and emotional abuse with the intent to lead someone to such a point of despair, confusion, and hopelessness, that they do kill themselves, as it was planned. This gives the guilty clean hands on the outside, that were pushing a silent slow death upon their victim. Guilt is hard to be found by these murders that induce this type of murder by creating self destruction, within. This is often used by spousal abusers in domestic violence and domestic abuse situations. I do believe my mom was induced. As I tell her story for her, may it change someone's heart in some way, that others may be saved from this insidious and evil act others exercise onto their chosen victim in many types of situations.

________________________

My mother's name was Sheryl Grace Gates . Her father, John Gates, was a wall paper hanger and had died while she was young. Her mother, Ruby Gates, wasn't able to afford her so she handed her to her mother in New York, who cared for her for a short time. My mother was then given to an orphanage, as her mother couldn't afford to care for her and neither could her grandmother.

Children in the orphanage had to work in fields while there. My mother grew up working hard in the fields without getting visits from her mother. Her grandmother would visit more than her own mom. She was abandoned and left to process her mother's abandonment, processing why her mother didn't want her enough to keep her, loosing her own father to his death.

No one wanted her. No one ever adopted her, because no one found value in her. No one loved her, apart from the orphanage workers who cared for the children, maybe, if she was lucky. She had no family. Not even her mom, who wasn't ever supposed to hurt her and leaver her, whom was all she had left after her dad passed away. And her own grandmother didn't want her enough to have kept her. Not even she saw her worth, to show my mom she was valued, loved, and belonged somewhere.