If I Would've Met You in 5 Years

z e r o

When I was growing up, my mom made me promise to never fall in love at a young age.

She didn't know promises are made to be broken.

However, let's just say he wasn't the one I thought would make me break that promise.

He was not the boy I thought I knew.

You were known to be chaos with beautiful brown eyes. No matter where you went, trouble and madness followed you. You were always doing the wrong things, with the wrong people.

But what a plot twist you were.

You were so much more than those eyes and problems.

The more that I got to know who you were under the surface, I fell in love with you. It wasn't instant. But when it happened, it was all at once.

I loved the way you made me feel. When I was with you I felt like I was on top of the world. You made me feel electric. It was thrilling and dangerous. You brought me 100 laughs and 1,000 smiles. When I was with you, I felt chronic youth and eternal summer. For that, I thank you for.

The way you trembled your lip when we kiss brought comfort. The way you loved my sappy sayings. The way you loved my mind and respected my morals. The way you'd stop me when I said anything negative about myself.

Or the way you would be encouraging when I wanted to take care of my self more.

At first I just wanted someone because I just wanted to fit in. Everyone just wants a partner because every music artist and every movie tells us that we won't be happy if we don't have someone by our sides.

But indeed, you made things perfect. Absolute happiness. However, when they weren't, it wouldn't matter because in the end, I knew you were in love with me too. The way you tried so hard to make me happy. The way we dreamed of growing together.

So when I seen that we would be dreaming on our own, I was confused, hurt, heartbroken. It's the worst feeling knowing you finally meet the one, your person. But, you meet them at the wrong time.

We end up tearing each other apart, by being too immature, not being grown up enough to have a real relationship. Being too insecure and jealous were major flaws of ours but no one left. We both stay trying to hold on to our teenage fantasy. Slowly, ruining each other more and more.

So when are time was up, even all my love couldn't bring you home. All of the lovely memories couldn't bring you back to me. Like the amazing nights we had. Or the amazing 2:00 am talks we had. All the beautiful letters we wrote to each other. Nothing could've stopped you from leaving.

It just wasn't in the cards for us. At least not here, not now.

If I would've met you later in my life though, what could we have been? We're getting older and I know things have changed. I know we can't reverse time and go back. Too much has happened, so many things aren't the same. But nights like this, I can't help but reminisce and fantasize of what would've happened.

Or how my life could've been if you continued to be in it.