Voodoo Doll «ᴊᴀᴅᴇsʏ»

Chapter 8

“So, Jess, what are we gonna do today?”

It was a question that Jade asked frequently. She didn’t know why—or how, for that matter—she’d started asking it, but she did. It was almost as if Jesy had some sort of force that kept pulling Jade towards her.

The girls were hoping that Jade wouldn’t suddenly become sick again. It was a traumatizing experience, watching your best friend suddenly stop breathing and writhe in pain. Jesy was extremely worried about Jade. It was funny, because Jesy was the one that was causing the pain.

Jesy was sitting down on her bunk. She looked up from her phone and at Jade, smiling. “We’re in Florida. We can go to the beach,” Jesy suggested. Jade nodded enthusiastically. That was another thing with Jade—she would agree with anything Jesy said, she would fight for Jesy’s opinion, and overall was following the Romford girl like a puppy in love with its owner.

Jade felt as if she couldn’t even control herself. She followed Jesy anytime and anywhere. Where ever Jesy went, Jade would follow. Whatever Jesy would want to do, Jade would do it. Whatever Jesy wanted, Jade would bring it for her. Jade was there whenever Jesy needed her. The funny thing was that Jade didn’t mind the slightest.

It was almost as if Jade loved Jesy just as madly as Jesy did her.

 

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Jesy was in her bunk packing a little big. It didn’t contain much—some sunscreen, flip-flops, a towel or two. She had a swimsuit on with some shorts over it. Jesy felt quite prepared for the beach.

Jade came in skipping happily to Jesy’s bunk. Jade didn’t know why, but she was incredibly happy to see Jesy. Jesy seemed to captivate her for some strange reason. It was like Jesy had her under some sort of spell—but, come on, how ridiculous would that be?

“Hi, Jess!” Jade said. She skipped over to Jesy’s bunk and sat down, positioning herself next to Jesy as if they were about to cuddle.

Jesy gave Jade a smile. “You seem happy today,” she said. Jesy loved to see Jade happy. Her smile and the light in her eyes always made Jesy’s heart flutter. But today seemed different. Jade still had a huge smile on her face, that’s for sure, but her eyes didn’t seem to shine like they usually did. Her eyes looked like something was forcing her to be happy.

“I’m happy wherever you are, Jesy,” Jade said. She rested her head on Jesy’s shoulder, snuggling into the crook of her neck. “You’re my best friend.”

Jesy sighed happily, resting her head on top of Jade’s. “Let’s go to the beach, yeah? Might as well go now before it gets cold.”

Jade got up, pulling Jesy up with her. “But really, Jess, is it ever cold in Florida?”

Jesy laughed. “You have a point.”

Jade smiled at Jesy, and Jesy smiled in return. That’s when she realized that Jade hadn’t let go of her hand.

“L-let’s get going,” Jesy said. She tried to play it cool, and it didn’t seem like she succeeded. At least Jade didn’t seem to notice. Jade and Jesy got out of the hotel hand-in-hand, only seeing each other in their worlds.

Leigh-Anne and Perrie were too hurt to point out that they weren’t invited.

 

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Jade couldn’t feel anything.

She couldn’t feel happy, she couldn’t feel sad. The only thing she could feel, it seemed, was pain. She could feel when she was short of breath. She could feel when her heart was hurting. She could feel her head throb. That was the only thing she could feel.

Jesy would take the occasional glance at Jade, and she would look at her eyes. They were always shining. But now, when Jesy looked at her, Jade’s eyes didn’t seem to shine. They looked emotionless. Jesy wanted to be there and make Jade happy. She wanted to make Jade’s eyes shine. She couldn’t.

The beach was okay, as beach dates go. At least, Jesy thought it was a date. Jade didn’t seem to think so—then again, Jade was hardly thinking anymore. Jesy wouldn’t say it was a date, though. Sure, Jesy loved Jade, and she loved Jade to death, but she couldn’t risk saying it was a date. She couldn’t risk rejection again, not when Jade was so close to being hers.

It was close to the evening in Southern Florida when Jade and Jesy decided to go back to their hotel. They packed their things, intertwined their hands, and they walked back. They looked like a couple on a romantic walk down the beach. Jesy didn’t let herself say that out loud.

“Did you have fun?” Jesy asked. She felt insecure. What if Jade said no? What if she didn’t have fun? What if she’s sick of Jesy? So many questions were running through the brunette’s head, and she was slowly letting the cynical thoughts take over.

“I’m having fun wherever you are, Jesy,” Jade replied.

Jesy sighed in relief, incredibly happy with Jade’s answer. She was glad that Jade had a good time. But something in the back of Jesy’s mind was bothering her: did Jade really mean it?

 

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Once they got back to the hotel, Jesy immediately went to her bed. “I’m pooped,” Jesy said. “I really want to hit the hay. Wake me up if you’re having dinner, please.”

Jade told her to not hit hay (as it was abuse), and that she would wake Jesy up whenever she was needed.

Once Jesy’s head hit the pillow, she was fast asleep. Jade smiled down at her, sighing softly. “You’ve had a busy day,” Jade whispered.

“You would know that, wouldn’t you?” Leigh-Anne said from the threshold. Jade looked at the curly-haired girl, and she couldn’t help but think that Leigh-Anne’s voice had a cold tone to it.

“What do you mean?” Jade asked in a whisper. She got up from Jesy’s bed and walked over to the Jamaican girl.

“I mean, you would know that Jesy’s been having a long day. You’ve been spending every second of every day with her, after all.”

“Leigh, what are you talking about?”

“Oh, stop it, Jade. You know exactly what I’m talking about!”

Jade shook her head, and she brought a finger to her lips. “Jesy’s sleeping,” she said in a hushed voice.

“That’s just the thing!” Perrie exclaimed. She stood right next to Leigh-Anne on the other side of the threshold. “You’re with Jesy all the time. You care about her. We know you do. Hell, we care about her, too, Jade! The thing is you and Jesy have been spending this entire tour together! This isn’t Little Mix anymore, Jade. This is Jade-and-Jesy. You nor Jesy seem to give a fuck about Leigh and me anymore.”

Jade’s eyebrows creased, and she shook her head once again. “That’s not true. I care about you! I really do. I just…”

“You like Jesy more than you like us…don’t you?” Leigh-Anne asked.

Jade shook her head.

“Then what is it?” the pushed.

Jade couldn’t answer. She looked at the sleeping body of Jesy on the bed, and she turned back to Leigh-Anne and Perrie’s sad eyes. Jade didn’t know what to say. She was at a loss for words.

“Jade,” Perrie said. “Is it possible that you may be interested in Jesy?”

Jade didn’t know how to answer that either.