Dreaming About Him Ever Since

Epilogue

It was hard not to trace the scar on my left wrist as I waited for my new doctor. Apparently my old one left on maternity leave. To be honest, I don't even remember her name.

"Where's the others?" I ask Jayden who is sat beside me. Antiseptic fills my nostrils. I generally didn't dislike hospitals, I used to spend a lot of it with dad when I was younger. I have new memories now. 

"They went shopping," he says. I know he's lying. I do the shopping. My other brothers had left early, before I woke up which is no small feat. I couldn't get over how well I slept next to Josh. I felt strangely refreshed, a feeling now s foreign. 

Josh had taken me home on his bike the next day. Jayden picked up Valarie and my stuff. 

When I walked into Will's house - my house - four days ago and explained to my brothers that I remembered Josh from before the accident and little details which happened after the accident. Like Mariam. What happened to her? And Ivy? Did Tyson end up telling her he liked her? 

And the paintings in Josh's room. How could I forget them? Something so important.

My brothers blinked back tears once they processed my news, though there was one important fact. 

No one wanted Ara, the alcohol addict, the girl who drank away her problems, no one wanted her back.

Neither did I. 

The doctor checked my physical body. The deep scar on my wrist, the silky white dent in my rib, all my joints and muscles and finally, an MRI scan on my brain.

Everything was back to normal. 

It was over six months, as originally predicted, that my memory would return, but everyone was glad it had returned at all.

Will's house - my house - always felt different when I entered it. It felt strangely fuller, like the water had finally turned to ice. No one was walking on egg shells, trying not to trigger memories or leave me left out. 

After the doctors, Josh took me for a driving lesson and I was finally able to drive a motorbike on my own. Straight after, we used the money in my bank account kindly left by my parents to buy myself a motorbike. I was limitless and independent. 

I drove to Val's first. Riley was there and both were ecstatic. I took them for a drive individually on the roads that winded through the forest that surrounded us. 

Then I drove home to show my other brothers. They had finally returned home, though none looked to pleased. They pretended to be happy though I noticed something was bothering them.

I wanted to tell uncle Will, but he was in his office and we weren't allowed to knock unless it was an emergency. 

I thought, fuck it, it's not every day your niece receives her license is it? So I knocked and waited patiently, the paper work for my license in hand. 

"Come in."

"Hey uncle Will, I know you said not to interrupt you while you were-"

"it's okay, Arvada."

"Please call me Addie."

"Addie, I wanted to talk to you, actually," He says as he clicks a final button on his laptop, turning around in his chair. 

I had never seen the inside of uncle Will's study. The entire room seemed to be made of wood. The room ended abruptly on the right, on the other side of the door, where the kitchen started. Along that wall was a glass cabinet and bookshelf, containing things like folders, books, a baseball glove and a few sculptures that looked like they belonged in the Metropolitan Museum. I was surprised to find images of dad and uncle will when they were children, smiling with grass stains on their shirts. There were even pictures of my brothers and I, the images gave a time lapse of how we aged.