Just like Starting Over (John Lennon fanfiction)

Chapter 3

Its been 2 months since the funeral, John has been getting better. He doesn't hide in his room, he doesn't go out drinking, and he has been concentrating more on his music. Julian has gotten used to living in my house, he and his dad have been bonding more. I've taken on the role as wife/mom even though John and I aren't together and Julian doesn't call me mommy, but I take care of both of them plus feed them and everything else. Our lives may seem hectic but I think the three of us are pretty content given our situation.

The one problem with all of us living here was obvious, we needed more room. My house was made for two maybe three people if there was a couple, but John and I weren't and sleeping in the same bed brought up old feelings. We couldn't go to Kenwood, it wouldn't feel right. I sat on my couch with a sigh, Ruby padded into the room and sniffed my hand. Moving or not I would need to go to Kenwood Julian missed his things, he had some here but not all of them. I stood and walked over to the young boy's room, he was laying on the floor playing with cars. "Hey Jules?" I asked, leaning against the doorway.

Julian raised his head, "Yeah Izzy?"
"Wanna come with me to your old house to get some toys?" I asked, I really hoped he would.

He sat up and scrambled over to his closet to find his shoes, "Yes! Will Mommy be there?" I looked down, "No honey, Mommy is somewhere else." He nodded before grabbing my hand as we left.

Pulling into the gravel drive way past the dark gates was nostalgic. All the dinners, parties, and writing that had happened at the house over the years. I got Julian out of the car and we walked into the large white house.

"Okay Julian, pick out what toys you want to bring back." I told the little boy as I started picking up guitar cases of John's.

"Why can't we stay here with Daddy?" Julian asked.

I stopped in the doorway, "Well um, we're just staying at my place until Daddy feels better." I placed the guitar cases in the trunk of my red car, I turned around to see Jules behind me holding a box of his toys.

"Is Daddy upset because of Mommy?"

"Yeah honey, he is. Now put your toys in the car, we gotta grab some clothes for you and Daddy."

Julian skipped into the house, "Can we get some Christmas decorations?"

I had totally forgot to decorate, "Of course! I have my own decorations though so only your favorites."

~

"Daddy!!" Julian squealed as he ran into my house. I smiled, following behind him carrying some boxes. Julian jumped on the couch, "Daddy! We went home and got some things and Christmas stuff! We're gonna decorate today!"

John pulled Julian into his lap, "Sounds great Jules, I think we should help Izzy now."

The hot water boiled in the pot as I waited for the pot to whistle, I decided to make hot chocolate. A Frank Sinatra Christmas record was on in the living room, I hummed along as I sat at the table. "Bloody hell!" John yelled from the other room, he was in charge of putting the fake tree together and making sure the lights work.

Finally the tea pot started to whistle softly, I picked it up pouring the hot water in the three mugs and stirring. I floated mini marshmallows on top before taking them out to the boys on a red and green tray. I handed Julian his and placed John's on the table next to where he was on the floor.

"No chance some Christmas cheer is in there huh Iz?" John grinned.

I scoffed, "No sorry John." He gave me a quick pout before going back to the lights.

"Ta-da!!!" John exclaimed pointing at the tree colorfully lit and standing up. Julian ran over to the box of decorations.

I followed behind him, "Jules sweetie, be careful!"

We decorated the tree as John sat on the floor, writing. I hummed along to Old Blue Eyes, and glanced at John. His glasses slid down his beak like nose, he looked down at the paper in front of him, and hugging his leg to his chest.

"Whatcha writing John?" I asked taking a seat next to him on the carpet.

John put his hand over the paper, "Nothing you need to see at the moment."

I pouted, "Ughhh fiine." I stood back up to help Julian try to hang an ornament higher up on the green branches. That night we fell asleep exhausted from our evening of putting the house together.

~

A week later John and I were getting ready for the Apple annual Christmas party, one of my friends came to babysit Julian. It was Christmas Eve so when we got home from the party we'd get the little boy ready for bed.

I ran throughout the house, "John? Where's the present for Pattie?" I searched our room and under the bed.

John laughed, "In the pile of presents by the door love." I got up from under the tree, straightening my red dress before leaving the room. John started to pack all the presents in the car as I put my coat on and went through last minute things with my friend.
Julian ran up to me in his footy pajamas, "Where's Daddy?"

I pointed outside, "He's putting things in the car." Julian's little padded feet slid on the wood as he tried to get to the front door.

I stood in front of the door, "No way Mister, its snowing out there. He'll come in." Julian slid back into the living room with a little grin, he was too much like his dad sometimes.

John walked in, shaking the snow off his jacket. "Its bloody cold out there, ready to go?"

I nodded as Julian came sliding around the corner to go and hug his dad before he left, "I love you Daddy." Then he wrapped his arms around my leg, "I love you Izzy." I smiled, bending down to hug him. "I love you too kiddo."

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