Be My Superhero~Liam Dunbar~

here's a poem I wrote

It would be great of you guys could give me pointers cause I'm going to a poetry slam. Disclaimer this does deal with rape and sexual assault the is a lot of graphic shit going on and curilsing.....obviously

                            ...................
We met at a party

connecting  eyes

Predator to prey

And after that he ignored me

Or maybe that's what he wanted me to think

But I felt him sticking lustful notes on the spot in the back of my head  where he would constantly stare

The same handwriting that was on the post it notes that said “ I like you so much, you're so beautiful”

He would lick his lips like he could already taste my blood trickling into his veins

Absorbing my will

Free will

Will to live

His soul reached out to mind but he never did

Maybe if he had talked to me

Maybe if he had tried to woo me like in the movies

Maybe if he didn't use the excuse that he was just so fucking shy

But i guess in the end…..he wasn't shy enough

Maybe if I hadn't worn a skirt that day and exposed my ankles

Maybe if it hadnt been 100 degrees outside

Maybe if my dad didn't work so late

Or maybe just maybe if I hadn't been asking for it

But he found me and his whispers were so loud and my mind so silent

And he took me

Took my life

Took my mind

Took me face down ass up

Face down so that he couldn't see the tears roll down my eyes

Face down so that he wouldn't see my face wide with horror slowly stof fighting and relax

Maybe he thought i would fight a little harder

And I thank Him

I thank him for smooshing my face dow to the ground covering my ear with one hand the other with the grass

I thank him for thinking I am worthy of grass

His lying words filtered and muffled

“That I was so pretty.” “That he loved me” “That I was practically begging for it”

And his justifications approved in court.

And I Thank him for being quick

He didn't last long at all

I thank him for not looking at me anymore

I thank  him for all the domestic abuse I will go through in the future because

No matter how many times they bang me, screw me, pound me at least I'll feel loved and full

And I thank him for teaching me how not to ask for it

How to dress in baggy clothes to conceal the fingerprints that he had left behind

Because you can't get rid of fingerprints...I learned this from a science professor at a college tour who's eyes lingered everywhere but my face and who insisted on talking to me after the lecture alone

Because I had sad eyes

The only way you can get rid of fingerprints is to burn them

And even then they still  come back

And trust me many of my other partners have tried to burn them off of me first with care and love and soon after transitioning to the lot end of their cigarettes

Leaving me with holes in my skin

In my masks

Sometimes I wish I didn't have any holes are all

To eat

To breathe

Nobody talks about it though so I decided I wouldn't talks about it either

It's not like schools are jumping left and right to teach girls how to react in such situations or for boys to exercise the smallest morsel of self control

Instead we have dress codes and coffee smiles telling us just how pretty we look but how we must cover up so that their husbands don't look to long I mean the other class mates

No body talked about it so I decided I wouldn't talks about it

I wouldn't talks about how my father hugging me makes me slightly uncomfortable Because not Because I'm scared…...well yeah I'm scared

I'm scared that my papa will squeeze me hard enough for him to see that his little girl isn't so little anymore and she will vomit all the black shit that lives in her coming out of her ears so that she cannot hear comfort in anything or anyone

I don't talk about how boys walk around waving their dicks around slaying their way to the top of the fucking tower but what could be so that defiling someone a daughter, mother, someone's everything could be right

No matter if it's with words

You screaming nice tits out of your parked car and us looking down thinking “ Is he going to kill me?” we don't respond to his liking. So instead we say thank you.

Imagine your baby sister looking up at you with wide eyes asking you why the boys at school are calling her a slut

Can't you take that anger and be a real fucking man and stand up for us

And you might say well…..I don't care about you

And to that I would answer me neither but I care about your sister the one who I help with math homework

Because I'm this world women must look after each other and even that we can't do

And to the people who say that abortion  should be illegal I applaud you for continuing to take out decisions away and for making the word No mean Yes all over and over and over again

And if you tell me to pray to the Virgin Mary for strength one more Goddamn time I will literally scream because you can't demonstrate to me one miracle that Mary performed that didn't involve her vagina

What great role models we have

Amen