The Consequence

Chapter Twenty-Five

Chantelle looked alarmed but I couldn't control this rage inside of me. "Listen to him Jamie. We can explain everything." She pleaded. "Just sit down. Luke, go and make him a cup of tea." She commanded.

"I don't-"

"I would do as she says Luke." I spat. He was my best friend. He was supposed to have back – tell me everything and he neglected to mention or even bring up the one thing that has had me running for the past three years. How could he do that to me?

I genuinely felt hurt but the anger was overtaking and if I even heard his voice I was going to flip. I couldn't let it get to that. I had to listen to them both. This can't end up like Zak.

I clenched my fists and counted to ten as I tried to even out my breathing.

I collapsed back onto the black, leather sofa, my head in my hands and eyes closed. How could this have happened? I held her in my arms!

"How?" I mumbled. "How could she have survived?"

Chantelle moved to sit next to me and wrapped her arms around me. Her hands were freezing but also barely noticeable with the turmoil going round and round my brain.

She was rubbing a hand up and down my back and it was vaguely comforting.

"They managed to revive her in the ambulance, just. She was in such a bad way Jamie." She told me. "When I received the phone call from her mum I rushed down there as fast as I could and she was an absolute mess. What those bastards did to her – I will never forgive them."

I gulped. "It was my fault. Everything was." I admitted. My heart sunk further at the admittance.

"No it wasn't. What those monsters did to her – you had no control over it."

I glanced to the side to see her face. I wasn't sure if she knew and was keeping quiet to comfort me or if she genuinely didn't know that it was my fault. It was unnerving. How much do I tell her? I couldn't read her face at all.

"They're all dead now."

"Yes, so I have heard. Doesn't bring back the trauma that she went through though, does it?"

"What happened next?" I asked. I needed to know. It had better be a damn good excuse for Luke to lie to me! I was so confused over everything. When I held her in my arms, she was dead. Her heartbeat had stopped – who was in her ambulance? Fucking Superman?

"She didn't wake for nineteen days – the doctors thought she would wake up brain damaged – I mean, she obviously lost..." She faltered.

"She lost the baby. You can say it Chantelle. Our baby daughter died three weeks before her due date. It happened." She winced at how cold I spoke but I was hurt from the secrecy.

A part of me wanted them to hurt as well.

"Jamie." Luke tutted. "It isn't our fault."

"How? I could have been there for her! I would never have left if I knew she was alive!" I protested. "Nobody mattered more than Megan, if I'd have known..."

"You had no choice – you had to run. We all know you did. Megan was too ill to even move for three months. Do you really think she would have come with you? It is harsh Jamie but she was mourning the death of her daughter. How do you think she felt? She sure as hell didn't feel like jumping on the first flight to Australia."

Did he really just fucking ask that? "Do you mean the feeling of having your heart ripped out of your chest repeatedly? Like trying to kill yourself so you can go and meet them? Because in that deep and dark depression, all senses go out of the fucking window and the chance that you could close your eyes for good but somehow meet the love of your life and your child again sounds plausible? Like it is an actual possibility? I was grieving for both so don't give me that bullshit."