Single Boy ((Jeffmads))

I'm not a good singer

"Sometimes you gotta bleed to know~" I sang, my voice complete shit. I looked to my left to see Eliza on keyboard and Peggy had the guitar in her hands. The drummer was, of course, punk rocker Charles Lee. He twirled the drumsticks in his hands before playing along.

"That you're alive and have soul~ But it takes someone to come around to show you how!" I'm gonna mess it up so had oh no. "He's the tear in my heart!" The crowd cheered and danced and I couldn't help but let a smile come onto my face.

Jentsie whistled and I waved her over to the stage. She laughed as I pulled her up onto the stage, twirled her around three times, and then sent her back to the crowd.

"Songs on the radio are okay~" My voice cracked and I looked away from the crowd, getting nervous.

"But my taste in music is your face! And it takes a song to come around to show you how he's the tear in my heart!" I looked at James and Aaron in the crowd, dancing with each other, lips locked. I lost my wording and missed the line.

I cleared my throat, shook my head, and tried to continue. "He's the tear in my heart! Take me higher than I've ever been!"

It quieted down a bit and I took a deep breath, looking at James. They look so happy together. Smiling, arms around each other, laughing. I never stood a chance against Aaron, did I? He's so worried I'll take James away from him but he doesn't realize that he's the A team here.

"You fell asleep in my car I drove the whole time but that's okay I'll just avoid the holes so you sleep fine." James looked up at me and his smile faded.

Surprisingly, I didn't look away and continued singing. "I'm driving here I sit cursing my government for not using my taxes to fill holes with more cement!"

The crowd joined on the repeat and then it all went quiet. Eliza played the piano nice and soft and I sang nice and quiet.

"Sometimes you gotta bleed to know... That you're alive and have a soul... But it takes someone to come around! To show you how! He's the tear in my heart! I'm alive! He's the tear in my heart! I'm on fire! He's the tear in my heart! Take me higher than I've ever been!"

"My heart is my armor! He's the tear in my heart! He's the carver!" Tears formed in my eyes and I continued singing, "He's a butcher with a smile! Cut me farther...than I've ever been~"

The crowd whistled and cheered and I wiped my eyes, hoping nobody had noticed that. Peggy went back to get shuffled playlist, letting 2 or 3 more songs play.

I walked down into the crowd and hugged Jentsie, trying not to let out a single sob. She rubbed my back and handed me some spiked punch. I gladly took it and we raised our cups.

"Raise a glass to the hell we live and love in!" She declared. I followed up with, "Raise a glass to those who we are not good enough for!" We both laughed and drank our punch. She nodded to the doors and we stepped outside, the good air hitting us hard. I shivered and hugged myself.

Jentsie was shivering too but trying not to show it too much. I shrugged my jacket off and draped it around her, placing a kiss on her head. She was about to hand it back but I shook my head.

"You look as cold as Hamilton's heart, and that's disturbing." I joked. She pulled the jacket tight around her body and spoke, "You did great. That's a good song for you." I nodded and we stayed silent after that.

When the dance was over I stayed to help clean up. I made sure everything was perfect and then I helped bring Peggy's DJ stuff to her car and then I got into my own car. Jentsie went home way forever ago with some friend, I don't know who.

I went home and laid in bed, crying way too much to be truly okay. Jentsie called a couple times but eventually gave up on me, just like everybody else has.

Tomorrow is graduation and after that I'll have to start getting ready for college. I'll have to get a career, which is gonna be next to impossible for me, and battle off... battle off all of this stupid depression I have.

Great.

IT'S SHORT I KNOW SUE ME!!!

GUYS IF I'M ASKING FOR HELP WITH WRITERS BLOCK THAT MEANS I DESPERATELY NEED IT BECAUSE I USUALLY DON'T ASK FOR HELP!!!

SO LIKE IF YOU WANNA HELP PRIVATE MESSAGE ME AND WE CAN TALK PLEASE I NEED SERIOUS HELP!!!

EVERYTHING IS GOING TO CRAP IN MY BRAIN!!!