Damaged » h. styles au

Chapter 98 - Scarlett

There was a bit more of awkwardly staring, then, but just when I was about to actually leave, he cleared his throat, forcing himself forwards, and before I could actually establish a connection between body-brain, I was moving, too. At that moment, everything felt terribly fragile, and I was scared he might have wanted to kill me.

“Please tell me you’re not whom I think you are,” he mumbled silently when we were close enough, his hands stocked in his pockets as he visibly tried to keep some distance.

Definitely a terrible idea, Scarlett.

“Well, I’m not queen Elizabeth, if that’s what you had in mind.” Even to my own ears, my voice was pathetic. But he was in front of me now, and it would be just stupidity to turn on my heels and leave without saying half of the things I had planned.

After so long, if I actually left right now, it would only make everything worse.

“Oh God,” he breathed out, and I was not sure if it was relief or despair that filled his words. “You’re actually here.”

“I suppose so, yeah.” One more awkward pause because why not. “Hi.”

He blinked slowly, breathing in an out just at the same pace. And, honestly, it shouldn’t be as scaring as it was. In the worst of all hypotheses, he would ask me to go and f–ck myself, leave him alone and never, ever try to look for him again. It was not a pleasant idea, but it was something I would manage to deal with.

“What are you doing here? I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.”

I smiled at him once more, not a full-force, but at least a decent one. I hoped. “Neither did I.”

Harry snorted, finally looking away from me and toward the trees. “You show up in front of my workplace, during my lunch time, and you’re telling me you didn’t expect to see me again?” he laughed despite himself, and it was not amused. “Really? You’re gonna go and tell me it was pure destiny, then?”

I took a deep breath, trying to remain unaffected by his words. “You’ve always been the one to believe in destiny; not me.” He shook his head, his eyes shutting for more seconds than a simple blink would take. “Not a coincidence, though. I did come here for you. I just didn’t ever think I would gather the strength to do so.”

He took a step back, sighing. “You didn’t have to bother.”

“I just want to talk.”

“Talk about what, Scarlett? Everything there was to talk was said five years ago. It’s there now, let’s not bring it back, please,” he begged, his eyes pleading. There was no reason for it, though. It was not my intention to go there again, anyway. “Do you have any idea of how many times I’ve seen you without actually seeing you? Or how long it took me to get over all of that? I was anxious about the day you’d show up here at first, but then I started dreading the idea. And here you are.”

“Believe me. I do know. And I swear I don’t want to make any harm, Harry. If you want me so badly to leave, I’ll go. Just say the word.” Don’t say it, I screamed inside, but there was also a part of me that would be completely relieved if I could just walk away and pretend I hadn’t done this at all.

“I gotta have lunch. Only have about forty minutes,” he stated dryly, glancing at his wristwatch.

“Fine. I’m leaving. Sorry for wasting your time.” I turned around, exhaling heavily and trying not to trip over my own feet as I walked back to the car, but then there was another sigh behind my back, and, soon, there was his voice too.