Markings on My Skin (Joshler)

føur - Døubt

Are you okay? Josh wrote on his arm the next morning. It took a few minutes for a reply to appear.

Do you actually care?

Josh paused. He decided he wouldn't have wanted to write to Tyler if he didn't care. Yeah I actually do

You wouldn't care if I was anyone else
That's the truth, I'm not trying to get pity
It's just that I'm on your arm

Well I'm here so

Okay
Well yes I'm okay
That's a lie
Haha

Is there something I can do?

No

Okay

Being my friend will just seem like you pity me, which you do
And ignoring me wouldn't help either

So what do I do?

Well now we know I can't cut so

Cutting is stupid anyway

Hell yeah
But it helps
And don't act like you know if you haven't gone through it
It's annoying when people think they understand

My girlfriend was cutting until a few months ago

You help her?

I think so. She doesn't really talk about it a lot

But she's been clean for a few months?

Yeah. I think so at least.

I've cut before
But this is the first time you felt it
Which is weird

Talking to someone by writing on my arm is weird.

True
Have to go. I'm at school. Don't want anyone seeing me writing to my secret pal

Wow
Secret pal
Really?

Tyler didn't respond. Josh sighed and got up. He wondered how far away Tyler was. If he was starting school when Josh was getting up, he must be in a different time zone or a really weird school.

Josh scrubbed his arm until all the ink vanished. Then he started getting ready for school.

__________________

"Hey, Olivia?" Josh asked as he and his girlfriend sat down for lunch.

"Yeah?"

"Um..." Josh didn't know how to ask her discreetly.

"What?" Olivia noticed it wasn't going to be a lighthearted conversation.

"You know I found out you were cutting a few months ago?"

"Yes." Her expression immediately fell.

"I was wondering if... If you have since... Then." Josh couldn't look her in the eyes.

"Yeah. Like twice." She shrugged. "Not like I used to."

"Okay. Just know I'm here for you, okay? I don't want you getting hurt."

She gave him a slightly forced smile. "Thanks."

He put his arm around her and gave her a little squeeze. "We can talk about something else now. I love you."

She smiled a little bit. "Okay. I love you too."

__________________

Josh?

Tyler?

Now you're actually responding to me
It's weird.

Okay

I bet it's because you're concerned though

Is there something wrong with that?

Yessssss

What?

Tyler started drawing something on the back of his hand. Josh couldn't figure out what it was.

Then Tyler wrote, guess what I'm drawing.

A chipmunk

No. Tyler kept drawing.

A tree
A yo-yo
A llama
A snowshoe
A bird

A check mark appeared by the words a bird.

Good job

Thanks. My turn.

Josh started drawing.

A circle?
A fruit
Orange
Josh you suck at drawing apples

Sorry jeez

It looks like this. An apple that looked better than Josh's appeared on his wrist.

Well some people can draw better than others

Very true

Yup

Um.
So where do you live?
If you don't mind
Sorry

Um well I live in LA.

Oh. I live in Columbus.

Ohio?

Yessss.

Okay. Sounds fun.

Oh totally
It's just a blast over here
Sunshine and daisies and roses and frolicking through fields-

I was making filler, not actually saying it was fun.

I know.

Yup.

So does this mean we're friends or....

I don't know

Well make a decision.
I'm not going to write on my arm to a supposed-to-be-soulmate who won't even be my friend

Josh hesitated. Did he really want to be friends with Tyler? Before he could let himself think about it any more, he wrote on his arm. Okay we're friends.

Cool.