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Chapter 1

"Am I asleep, am I awake, or somewhere in between?"

- Truly Madly Deeply, One Direction

Chapter 1

Nobody noticed me as I sat on the lone park bench, but of course they wouldn't. Nobody noticed me, ever. Every single time a person walked past, I wished, hoped, that they would turn to me and ask me how I was. Ask why I was sitting all alone. Make a comment on the way I was dressed. But no, not a single person looked my way.

Over the course of time, a few people sat beside me on the bench, but not one said a single word. They didn't even acknowledge my presence whatsoever. But, like usual, I expected this. It wasn't like any of them should be able to speak to me at all. It wasn't normal. I gave up on everyone ages ago.

I thought back to that time, so long ago, when I caught that dreadful disease going around and 'died'. Shortly after, that man approached me, the tall, dark one, and told me I had become one of them. But what was them? He had only told me the basics, nothing I really needed to know. How when somebody died eighteen days after their eighteenth birthday, they became one of them. How truly 'living' people couldn't speak to us, hear us, or see us in any way. How we could touch objects but not change the way that they were. A million different things he told me, but none answering the question I continued to ask him over and over again; would I ever be able to be seen, heard and live again?

He said that there could be a way, but it had never been done before. That had given me the impression that he knew but refused to tell me about it.

The one truly useful thing he told me was that it was possible to be seen and spoken to by certain people. He explained that these people were special, and could sometimes see a select few of people like us. People who were ghosts, but not really at all. They were dead, but halfway in between, not quite living, but not quite completely gone.

And being one of these not quite completely gone humans was extremely boring. Since I couldn't move anything or hold a conversation with someone, the days passed slowly and painfully. I didn't know why I chose to sit on the same park bench, every single day, sometimes not moving for weeks. It honestly wasn't very interesting. Maybe it was the fact that I saw different people bustling by every day, and hoped that one of them was 'special', like the tall man described. Or maybe it was that I could watch the entire world go by. Either way, eventually, I got tired of it.

So when a woman of about twenty five looking very insignificant and ordinary quickly walked past, I got up and followed her. Her feet left crisp footprints in the snow as she cut off the path and took a shortcut across the park, aiming for the street on the other side. I frowned in annoyance, looking behind me as I walked to see my nonexistent footprints following behind. To make me feel a little better about being dead, I made sure to stand in the woman's footsteps, giving me the illusion that the footprints were mine. Though, deep down, I knew that they weren't, but I tried not to think about that.

She crossed the road without looking and almost got smashed into by a car; a car that honked very loudly at her and sent her a very rude hand gesture as they raced off. She made a face at the retreating vehicle before walking up to a three storey unit that was connected to many other three storey units and unlocking the door, almost closing it behind her before I could retreat inside. Luckily, I was fast, and managed not to get my knee-length peach dress caught in the process.

"Jesus Christ, it's cold," the woman cursed, half-jogging to what I had learned to be called a thermostat and turning on the heating. After removing her coat, she ran up the stairs two at a time, leaving me standing at the entrance. I shrugged and sat down on her couch, staring at the massive flatscreen TV and wondering how on earth people these days came up with such advanced technology. Everything was always upgrading and upgrading so fast, much too fast for me to keep up. I swear only yesterday people were watching channels on box televisions and just getting onto the grasp of colour TV. And all of a sudden, flat screens in high definition came along and it made my mind go crazy.

The young woman soon came back down the stairs and made her way to the kitchen, bringing out some cold pizza from the fridge and putting it into the microwave. I stared at her jealously as she ate it, wondering what food even tasted like after so many years of not eating. Since I couldn't pick anything up, I couldn't touch food, therefore eating wasn't something I could do. When she had finished, she came to the couch and sat down, turning on the big device on the wall and getting comfortable next to me. I watched her as she watched the screen, seeing her expressions change at different times, smiling at the interest she held in the program. All too soon, the television was turned off and the woman left to go upstairs again. I realised that it was dark outside, which meant it was nightfall, and considered going to see if I could find a spare room, but decided that since I couldn't sleep, it was useless.

The couch wasn't exactly comfortable, because I couldn't sink down into it like everyone else could, but it was better than being outside on the bench, alone. I lay down and closed my eyes, not thinking about much at all except what pizza could possibly taste like, what I would be able to do in the morning, and the hours ticked by in complete silence, with the exception of light snores drifting down from upstairs.

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Sorry about the short, shitty and very boring chapter, but I always suck at writing first chapters, and I promise the next one is more interesting :) just read the next one when I post it, it'll make up for this one ahaha (the chapters for this story will usually be about twice this length just letting you know)

So, I'm super excited for this story, but, if nobody comments telling me they like it or what they think of it, I won't update as often. I am writing this for myself, bc I like it and I enjoy writing it, but if nobody wants to read it or likes the idea, then I simply won't post it. It's simple :)

So here we go, my third attempt at a long fan fiction, I think I can do it this time :) thank you, and please vote and comment :)

(P.S. The song lyrics at the top will always be from either One Direction songs or 5SOS songs, and I'll try to make them relate to the chapter as much as I can :) if cant find lyrics that relate, I'll just pick some random ones or maybe a quote by one of the boys aha)