16."Fire Away" (Angst)

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"Choose the words that cut like a razor
And all that I'll say is fire away. Take your best shot, show me what you got. Honey, I'm not afraid."

3rd Person:

"I swear I fucking hate you sometimes." Leigh snarled, yanking her arm away from Harry's grasp. Her face was filled with anger, though It really didn't phase him. She was usually angry like this when she drank, he tried to stop her but she'd get defensive and tell him that she's grown. she can take care of herself.

"Yeah I know. Now come on," he was trying to guide her through the crowded club, bodies grinding all over each other made it difficult though. "I'm not your child Harry!" she shouted again, the music still muffling most of them. "Yes, but you are my wife so, let's go." Harry said sternly, grabbing a hold of her wrist.

She had finally given in and followed him, stumbling through the crowd before Harry wrapped his arm around her waist, hoisting her up in his grip and carrying her small frame though the mess of strong alcohol and body oder.

"Why does this happen every time you drink alcohol Leigh-Anne?" Harry finally huffed, glad to make it out of the loud club. He hated what she became when she drank. "Fuck off Harry," she slurred pushing him away again, she'd had enough of him.

"Why are you so angry at me Leigh? What've I done?" Harry asked trying his hardest to get her into the car and home safe. "Don't act like you want to be here for me now." Leigh hissed stumbling over to the car, vodka still burning in her veins. 

It had been about 6 months since the two of them lost their baby, and Leigh's grieving mechanisms was downing as many shots as she could until she could barely stand. Harry put his heartache into his work, making sure to keep a on smiling face no matter how much sorrow he felt.

"What are you on about?" Harry frowned "I've always been there for you, I've bought you all kinds of jewelry and clothes. The humongous house we live in, I bought for you, everything I do is for you Leigh-Anne." he rambled, heart racing in his chest.

"Do you really think I give a shit about any of that?" Leigh-Anne shouts. "Where were you when I was crying all night? Where were you when I found out I had a miscarriage?"

The tears threatened to fall from his green eyes as he thought of what to say. He'd been so busy with work that he really wasn't there for the women he loved most in the world. "I'm-I'm so sorry baby-" he truly didn't know she felt that way.

"Just.....take me home Harry." she mutters wiping the tears from her eyes. "And just for the record, I blame you." she added. "I blame losing our child on you," finally yanking the car door open and slamming it behind her.

Harry felt like fog was clouding his mind. That what Leigh-Anne had just confessed to him wasn't really how she felt. How could she blame him for the loss of their baby? The doctor said it wasn't anyone's fault.

He climbed into the driver's seat, not saying a word. The tears slid down his cheeks, like a broken faucet. Did she really feel that way?

**********
"I guess I'll sleep on the couch." he mumbled, she didn't reply though, he assumed she wouldn't. With his pillow and a small blanket in hand, he walk down the wooden stairs to the living room couches, eyes still somewhat burning with tears.

It was true, he had left Leigh-Anne all alone most of the time, because of work, and when she lost the baby he used my pain as an excuse to work harder. But he had only dug so far into his work because he wanted Leigh to have the best life, he wanted to give her the world, which didn't turn out the way he had hoped.

His head fell deep into the pillow as his eyes fluttered shut, finally having some relief from the burning they had been feeling since he got home. He could've sworn his eyes were bloodshot, they felt that way. He shivered under the thin fabric that was his blanket, it didn't compare to the warmth he felt cuddled up with Leigh.

It felt like forever when his eyes ripple open at the feeling of someone wrapped around his torso. He glances over his shoulder to find Leigh-Anne, with smudged mascara and wet eyelashes pressed against his body. Her lip was quivering, and Harry's heart shattered.

"Baby," he sighed, turning to face her, wrapping her in his warm embrace and placing kisses on the warm skin of her forehead. She sobbed under him, latching onto him tighter, like she was hanging on for dear life. The sound of her pain rippled though Harry's chest, he could feel his chest caving in as his soul crumbled at the sound of her anguish.

"I'm so sorry." she whispers into his chest, never loosing the grip around his body. Her heart buried, as she continued to sob into her husbands bare chest. "I shouldn't have said those things, I don't hate you. I don't blame you for losing the baby. I was just upset and sad and depressed, I shouldn't have taken it out on you." she rambled, finally releasing Harry a bit, to let her gaze find his.

His mind raced, as his eyes locked in her. Her brown orbs glistening with tears that threatened to fall. He searched her face for a few more seconds before embracing her small frame again. He didn't care that she had taken out her anger on him, he was just glad she was back in his arms again.

"I love you so much." He mumbled, his heart still ached though. This moment had reiterated the fact they were broken. The loss of a child, is never easy. The both of them had their own ways of coping. "I'm sorry for abandoning you when you needed me. I'm sorry for putting all my focus into the company and not us, we needed each other and I pushed you away." It hurt to admit that. His eyes stung again, as his thoughts worked hard on his brain.

"I promise, it will never ever happen again baby, our relationship and family are my number one priority." He rambled, latching onto Leigh-Anne, wanting desperately to have her closer though it was pretty much impossible. "I love you so much, Harry." She signed, pushing her face deeper into his neck, taking in his scent and warmth. Seemed like forever since they had been wrapped within one another, and to have this feeling again was amazing.

"I love you, Leigh-Anne, so much."

Hey y'all! Just a quick update, this has been in my drafts forever and I finally had the muse to finish it, I hope it's good enough. The part 2 for Girl Crush will be out soon, I promise, just gotta figure out how I'm gonna go about it lol.

- Brittany <3

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