"Nightmare" - Jin Oneshot

Nightmare

Whenever I close my eyes, I see a big city with huge buildings in my dreams. The streets are filled with people from young to old. Students with their bags, walking to school, adults on their way to work. Some of them even wear suits and have a suitcase.

However, everything is grey, there are no colours. The crowd which I am in is moving slowly rather barely. People don’t care if I accidentally bump into them because I am nothing to them, they just look straight forward without any emotion in their face. -

Everything seems so lifeless. I feel lost and lonely, I want to run away, back to our home. My feets start to go faster and faster but the surrounding isn’t moving at all, it’s like time has stopped.

After an endless feeling while, I reach our little house that’s close to the central of the city. The door stands wide open, I’m entering and nothing changed, thankfully. I sighed in relief and look around the rooms, something is odd…-

Why aren’t you home? Do you have to work earlier today?

Where are you right now, Kim Seokjin, my love, my reason to live?

I go to the kitchen, the flowers on the windowsill are beautiful, I guess that you bought it for me? How sweet, you know I love lilies especially white ones.

It’s a dream but you’re still able to make my heart flutter, make me fall for you again.

“He would be happy, if he sees that I cooked a delicious dinner.”

A lovely, bright smile is formed by my lips and I am feeling more comfortable, I just have to think of you to have butterflies in my tummy. - I guess this is true love, yes love.

I get the frying pan and some ingredients and immediately begin to cook your favourite meal, I am so excited to see you when you get back from work. - I already miss you, my dear.

It takes about an hour until I finish everything. The table is decorated with a white tablecloth and silver cutleries.

I want to wait but … I am hungry, I guess you’ll forgive me since everyone would get hungry if they wait for 4 hours without eating for the whole day.

Anyway, when are you coming back Jin? I keep looking at the clock, the hand is moving so slowly again… how long should I wait for you to come back?

11pm - You never have to work until such a late time...never. I stand from the table up and search for my phone in my little handbag. Your number is dialing but I can only hear a female voice on the other end repeating:

“No connection, called number can not be reached. No connection, called number can not be reached. No connection, called number can not be reached…-”

My brain doesn’t work anymore, my mind is blank.

Suddenly, the phone rings and your name appeared on the display.

“Hello? Jin...love, are you okay because you aren’t here...at home. I am starting to freak out, I am panicking! Tell me...where are you?!”

“Honey, is that you?” - my mother’s voice.

“Mom…? Why do you have Jin’s phone… it’s not funny. If this is a joke I am going to-”

“Oh my, Y/N what are you doing? Are you at your house?”

“Of...of course! Why shouldn’t I be here? Anyway… where is Jin, he hasn’t come home yet…”

“Darling, did she escape again?” - another voice, it is my father speaking in the background. I don’t understand anything, I just want him to come home already, nothing else.

“WHERE IS HE?!”

“Calm down, honey we’ll be right there. Wait a little bit, we’ll…-”

“I’m sick of waiting!!! NOW ANSWER ME! WHERE IS JIN?!”

“He passed away… a year ago. Please, calm down…-”

I hung up. There is no way that you’re dead! - This is only a bad nightmare… I’ve been dreaming the whole time, I have to wake up.

I slammed the bathroom door open and look around me, I need something to wake me up and no one should interrupt me, that’s why I lock the door behind me. Now I have my ease to think.

Opening the cupboard and every drawer, throwing every single tube and bottle on the ground, I am doing such a mess just to leave this bad dream. The liquid in the bottles is splashing, I cut myself on the glass but I don’t care, it’s only blood. Not as painful as not being able to see you.

I am going insane, tears running down my cheeks and ruining my black mascara, even my red lipstick is smudged. I grip on my hair several times and it gets tousled… I don’t want to look in the mirror, it would only show a frustrated girl who is trapped in a horrible nightmare.

“Maybe...water!” - a brainwave.

I let cold water pour into the bathtub and sit in it. My clothes get wet and my body is freezing but I need to wake up.

Hurry up Y/N!!! OPEN YOUR DAMN EYES!”

The water is overflowing and I am just sitting in the cold bathtub… lifeless, without any emotion in my face, barely moving. - It’s like time stopped for me.

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Psychosis is an abnormal condition of the mind that involves a "loss of contact with reality". People experiencing psychosis may exhibit personality changes and thought disorder.

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You can’t escape from this nightmare called reality